Legally Karma (Rhydin Election 2021)

[Strawberry]

(These are very very very heavily inspired by Legally Blonde, for those that are not acquainted with it. Just some funny drabbles, hope you enjoy!)

Twilight Isle - The Homestead

The scene; an idyllic homestead in the middle of the jungles of Twilight Isle. Several houses have been built in a clearing, well warded and protected from any who might venture upon the land without permission. To one edge of the property, an above ground pool is wrapped with a hand built wooden deck. Karma floats upon a unicorn pool float, her mother standing on the deck looking down at her.

Mother: "Governor?"

Karma: "It's a perfectly respectable job, Mama."

Cut to a wider shot, revealing Karma's other mother in a chair nearby. Further away, a small redheaded child about to fall off the wooden deck into a pile of leaves. Nobody seems to be paying attention.

Second Mother: "Honey, you were first runner up at the Miss Rhydin Tropical Cocktails contest. Why are you gonna throw that all away?"

Karma: "Becoming Governor is the only thing everyone else in our family hasn't done yet."

Mother: "Oh, sweetheart, you don't need Governor. Governor is for people who are boring and ugly and serious. And you, kitten, are none of those things."

Karma sighs.

[Strawberry]

Old Temple - The Office of Samson, Katz, and Samson, Public Relations Advisors

Karma sits across an oak desk from a perplexed looking PR advisor named Samuel Samson III. Samuel is looking at a folder of documents.

Samuel: "Governor?"

Karma: "That's right."

Samuel: "But that's the most difficult non-dueling title to obtain."

Karma: "Oh, I have a full resume of non-dueling accomplishments and an extensive educational background."

Samuel: "Yes, but your major was Divination, Astronomy, and Astrology. The voters won't be impressed that you aced History of Tarot."

The advisor sets the folder aside.

Samuel: "What are your back-ups?"

Karma: "I don't need back-ups. I'm going to be Governor."

Samuel: "Well, then, you'll need excellent endorsements."

Karma: "Current Governor Jaycy Alexander has given me her endorsement."

Samuel: "And a heck of publicity campaign."

Karma: "Right."

Samuel: "And a solid showing in any debates as well as the Governor's Cage Match if it happens this year."

Karma: "I once had to judge a tighty-whitey contest for the Dockside Dwarves Rugby Team. Trust me, I can handle anything."

Karma smiles and leaves.

Karma: "Thanks!"

Samuel: "You're... welcome?"

[Strawberry]

Video advertisements went out the same day the 2021 Candidates List was released to the public.

The shot is blocked so as to imitate a VHS recording. Karma sits in her pool. A caption on the bottom reads, “KARMA ARMSTRONG GOVERNOR VIDEO ESSAY.”

Karma: "Oh, hi. My name is Karma Armstrong, and for my gubernatorial campaign, I'm gonna tell all of you in Rhydin why I'm gonna make an amazing Governor."

Karma narrates over a shot of herself speaking at the head of a table of rather intoxicated looking friends.

Karma: (Narrating) "As resident event planner I'm skilled at commanding the attention of a room and discussing very important issues."

Cut to a close up of Karma’s face as she addresses her friends.

Karma: "It has come to my attention that the bar staff is switching our beer tap from Badsider to generic. All those opposed to that kind of alcohol abuse please say "aye.""

Friends: (In unison) "Aye."

Karma brings down a gavel.

The ad transitions to a shot of Karma lazing on a floatie in the pool.

Karma: "I'm able to recall hundreds of important details at the drop of a hat."

A red headed woman wearing oversized sunglasses enters the shot on another pool floatie.

Raz: "Hey, Karma, do you know what happened in the Marketplace yesterday?"

Karma: "Why, yes, I do. Just yesterday, the Market celebrated sixteen days since their last random act of violence and forty since the last bomb! Also, Sven of Sven's Sock Store confessed his love to the sweet street sweeper Maximus and the two are expecting their first child in the next week!"

The scene changes once more. Karma walks down a busy sidewalk in Dragon's Gate.

Karma: "I'm comfortable talking to citizens from all walks of life and pride myself on knowing where all the social events are."

Someone hollers at Karma from out of shot.

Person: "Hey baby, what're you doing this weekend?"

Karma: "Not you! But there is an end of summer kegger at Buster's in Seaside tonight at nine!"

Karma: "And that's why you should vote for me, Karma Armstrong, as your future Governor of Rhydin, Twenty-Twenty-One."

The ad ends with Karma's smiling face, still floating on the pool floatie.