Fytco Toy Company Presents:

[Gnort]

Fytco Proudly presents:
The Dueling Line of Action Figures!

[G]

Presenting: The Gustavus G'nort Esplanade G'neesmacher Dragoon-Talanador the Third Action Figure.

Special features:
Spring Action arm
Intense Vibrating Action
Removable goggles
Comes with interchangeable weapon grip including a Saber and a Hammer.

Comes with several key phrases:

• 1. G'nort 3:16 says -NO- Slashing!!™
  2. PLINKO!!™
  3. As a Duelist, I'm the best there is, the best there was and the best there ever will be.
  4. Ahh, Merci, my dulcet Darling. Oh, how I missed you.
  5. I swear, baby, she means nothing to me! I just bought coffee from her!
  6. I bet she gives great helmet.
  7. I'm the best Duelist.. in the world.
  8. To be the man, you have to beat the man.

[G]

Presenting: Rhydin Rewind Collection!
Featuring: Seirichi
Special features:
Seamless body.
Inflatable breasts.
Replaceable hands for separate grips and rude gestures.
Adjustable jaw to open the big mouth.
Six Unprintable Phrases. (Don't let the kids play with this.)



Featuring: Harris
Special features:
Removable Wife Beater shirts when you want different colors.
Adjustable hands for special gestures.
Removable hair for different styles.
Adjustable jaw to open the big mouth.
Switchblade Comb, that fakes people out thinking it's a knife but in reality he has to take care of that mop of hair, oh. so. Lovingly.

Several Choice Phrases. Three of which are unprintable (Don't let the kids play with this.) Including:

• 1. "Seirichi, shut up."
  2. "I'm so good, I don't even need to get in the ring."
  3. "Seirichi, no, really. Shut up."
  4. "Freckles, where's my sandwich?!"
  5. G's the man. Respect.

And many more!

[G]

Presenting: RekAsper!! Featuring: Rekah and Jasper!

Special features and accessories:
Inflatable belly on Rekah to compensate for pregnancy, single, twins, triplets, depends on how much water you think she drank!
Positional hands for expressions of exasperation on Jasper.
Special Super Cute Kissing Action.
Baking Oven, Cupcakes, and fire extinguisher for those times that you have Rekah baking.
Jasper's wings change color in water!

Six Rekah Phrases including:

• 1." Cake!"
  2. "More Cake!"
  3. "Cookies!"
  4. "Kitties!"
  5. "Why don't I have more Cake?"
  6. "Jasper, do you ever think that G'nort is the manliest man you've ever seen?"

Six Jasper Phrases including:

• 1. "Honey, no more sweets tonight, okay?"
  2. "Yes ma'am."
  3. "Can I get you a drink?"
  4. "All part of the service, ma'am."
  5. "I wub j00!"
  6. "Rekah, not only do I think G'nort is the manliest man I've ever seen, I want to emulate my life to be just like him, for you!"

[G]

Presenting: Jessanth!!
Featuring: Jesse and Xanth!

Special features:
Jesse:
Assorted witch accessories such as Cauldron, broom, vials of fake(Maybe) blood and various plastic reptiles.
Adjustable arms to allow for hugging Xanth.
Removable witches hat to replace with other cute outfits.
Art set to draw adorably creepy pictures for Xanth.

Comes with several key phrases:

• 1. He's the Keeper.. OF MY HEART.
  2. Yours forever and ever till undeath do us never part
  3. I WANT THEM ALL DEAD! DEAD, I TELL YOU! DEAD! DEAD AS ALL OF YOU!
  4. My hunger knows no bounds!
  5. I will sacrifice 7 baby goats to the Blood God X'guth in your name to help secure your victory.
  6. Success! I knew sacrificing all those goats would help!
  7. G is hot! Almost as hot as Xanth but not quite.

Xanth:
Adjustable arms to allow hugging Jesse, or strangling.
Glowing red eyes.
Glow in the dark hands.
Can use his hands as a defense mechanism, acts as a taser, releases a 40,000 volt shock. (Do NOT use on children!) *[See note under picture]

Comes with several key phrases, all Italicized.:

• 1. I fail to find the humor in this.
  2. I completey fail to comprehend what the hell I am even
  looking at. If I would have defacated into a paint can and
  sent it to the insane asylum, I would have gotten a more
  coherent picture than this.
  3. Once more I am appalled by the level of sheer, blithering
  idiocy that you projectile-vomit all over this forum as
  if you were suddenly struck by an apoplectic fit. Why this
  so-called community even allowed you to get away with a
  second reign in the Tower of Fire, after that last embarassing
  debacle, is beyond my comprehension.
  4. Hm Hm Haa Haa! Hm Hm Haa Haa!!
  5. I like G'nort.

There would be more, but we ran out of storage space.



(I did basic research on the shock from a taser. They are at around 50kv. You can get a 25kv shock from static electricity on a dry day from a doorknob. It's not the voltage that's the deal, it's the Amps. I left that out of the description to be vague. )

[G]

Presenting: Candy Hart!!

Special features and accessories:

Carry Everything Backpack.
Cigar that lights when you put it in her mouth.
That special blade for cutting people who make her mad. Looking at Seirichi here, among others.
Dog Tags for when you want her to look tough.

Several Choice Phrases Including:

• 1. "No."
  2. "I don't date."
  3. "I don't drink anythin I didn't open myself."
  4. "What."
  5. "In the Pit."
  6. "Don't make me hurt you. Drink Badsider."
  7. "I still don't date, but if G were single, I might reconsider."

And many more!

[G]

Presenting: Outback King and Queen!! Featuring: Matt and Koy!

Special features and accessories:

Matt:
Walker with removable tennis balls.
Cane.
Pilots license and and Governors card.
Voting ballot.

Koy:
Skin that easily bruises.
Hands that can ball into fists.
Wide kicking range.
Ball and Chain.
Leash for Matt.

Several Choice Phrases including:

Matt:

• 1. "Fight me, I'm old."
  2. "Crushbob!"
  3. "Don't burn down the Outback!"
  4. "Back when I was Governor..."
  5. "Would you like to join the RASG?"
  6. "Fight me, I'm still old."
  7. "I'm not nearly as good as G."

Koy:

• 1. "Make it brutal, bub."
  2. "Crushbob!"
  3. "I drank all the Skullsplitter again?"
  4. "Opals aren't for making fashion statements, bub. "
  5. "Sign me up."
  6. "You may want to do some more research about the Opals - they're not toys to be played with at random. "
  7. "G has incredible fashion sense. If only Matt were as sexy as G."

[G]

Presenting: Mercedes, the Brazilian Bombshell!!

Special features an accessories:

Hand on hip action.
Repeated sighing sounds.
Special Runway Walk with Cute Winking Action™
Random curses in Portuguese
Tons of clothing to change in to.
When paired with the G'nort action figure, she curses in Portuguese and sighs twice as much as normal! Also, it unlocks special actions that are inappropriate for children!

Several Choice Phrases Including:

• 1. "I have my own money, Gnort."
  2. "I'm not just a pretty face, I have a business mind, too."
  3. "Don't hit me in the face. I have a photo shoot in the morning."
  4. "Behave yourself, Gnort."
  5. "I can't take you anywhere"
  6. "Honestly, Who dresses you?"
  7. "Yes, another party and Yes, a tuxedo."
  8. "Go duel for me, G'nort. You know how I find it to be sexy."

And many more!

[G]

Presenting: Asian Invasion!!
Featuring: Aya, Hoi Mei, Kimone, Lena, Nayun and Rumiko!
Special features:
All:
Genuine Cloth Outfits that were knitted by hand. (Except for Aya, who would not ever allow someone to unclothe her.)
Multiple weapons to choose from, ranging from swords, to naginatas to handguns.
Purses, backpacks, brushes and more!
All Anatomically correct!
All have glaring actions.
Completely positionable in stylish Martial Arts poses.


Many Phrases including but certainly not limited to:

• 1. If you do not remove yourself from my personal space, you shall see what it is like to be a woman. - Aya
  2. Your failure is disappointing - Aya
  3. Rachael. Cease Dueling, you are bringing the women down. - Aya
  4. Men are disgusting creatures. - Aya
  5. You come, bring date, two for one! - Hoi Mei
  6. Drinks cost extra! - Hoi Mei
  7. Come eat Jade Dragon, yes? - Hoi Mei
  8. Really? - Kimone
  9. In it. - Kimone
  10. Yeah. - Kimone
  11. Would someone be interested in a match? Unarmed? - Lena
  12. Well done. - Lena
  13. Honor - Lena
  14. That is all. - Nayun
  15. Interesting - Nayun
  16. I will be ready to compete. - Rumiko
  17. I plan to take part. - Rumiko
  18. That G is a hot, sexy beast and I wanna get naked with him! - All. (Well, except Aya, because, well, Aya.)

[G]

Presenting: G's Exes collection !!
Featuring: Ariana(Prin), Kaja, Elle, and Khallayne!!
Special features:
All:
All have Wandering Eyes.
Ariana's Inflatable stomach.
Ariana's Constant chewing motion.. kind of like a cow.
Ariana's Hand to Mouth motion for feeding or drinking herself.. kind of like a cow.
Ariana's Gravitational Pull.
Kaja's Sexy poses.
Kaja's Sexy Fighting Stances.
Kaja's alternative outfits, including shirts that say "Porn Star."
Elle's Sexy poses.
Elle's.. well.. who can remember.
Khallayne's... oh hell, no one knows her anyway.
They all have stuff they can do, including changes of clothes, anatomically correct(Good luck checking Prin, though) and grips for weapons. Except Prin, who only grips food or drink.

Many Phrases including but certainly not limited to:

• 1. Feed me, babe. - Ariana
  2. Ho ho ho ho.. Boshuda - Ariana
  3. Bon Bon. - Ariana
  4. Is it greasy, fatty, high in calories and horrible for you but tastes awesome? Then OF COURSE I WANT MORE! - Ariana
  5. BELCH! - Ariana
  6. Hey Sugah - Kaja
  7. Miss me, Papi? - Kaja
  8. Yeah, whatevah. - Kaja
  9. Uhh, ah gots somethin' ta tell ya, G. - Kaja
  10. Where's Lupton? - Elle
  11. Have you seen Lupton? - Elle
  12. I really miss Lupton - Elle
  13. Lupton's sexy. Oh, so are you. - Elle
  14. You remember me? - Khalla
  15. I can't believe someone remembers me. - Khalla
  16. G, I drank the water. We're having twins. Girls. - Khalla
  17. I can't believe you remember having twin girls. - Khalla

[G]

Presenting: Anubis Karos!!
Special features:
Slave Collar and Leash.
Familiar Egyptian Sword.
Day Planner to incorrectly keep track of when it's okay to challenge for an Opal.
A "Hello. I'm Better Than You" Greeting sticker for self affirmation, since no one believes him.

Several Choice Phrases Including:

• 1. Do you know who I am?
  2. I challenge for an Opal.
  3. What do you mean my challenge is invalid again?
  4. I need a duel to remain active.
  5. Are you willing to make a wager on this duel?
  6. If I win, you become my slave. If I lose, I have no intention on following through with whatever your condition is. Do we have a deal?
  7. I am almost, but not quite, as good as G'nort. I really wish I was, though. He is spectacular.

And many more!

[G]

Presenting: The Wrecking Crew!!
Special features:
Interchangable Team Jerseys! Make Maria, Myria and Chris, Ria!
Name branded Baseball Bats.
Miniature Batteries for 'Battery Day.'
Bandages to wrap up hands for when they punch walls in anger.
Snap On Baby Belly for whichever of the Graziano Clan you want to have pregnant.
Each figure comes with giant foam "We're #1" pointing hand.
Each Figure comes with Bat Throwing Action, interchangeable with Batteries.

Several Choice Phrases Including:


Fio

• 1. Saints and Proxies!
  2. Harris is an idiot.
  3. Cut the Mic!
  4. Go Crew!
  5. G, you're my Hero!

Myria

• 1. Can I be your PR Manager? It'd be nice to have a side-gig where I get paid big money for accomplishing absolutely nothing.
  2. Good luck with that.
  3. Way to live in the past, dude.
  4. Rakeesh is still a punkass bitch. My sister's still right.
  5. Catch you on the flipside.
  6. Maybe you need to get you and your opal an alarm clock. Guess you get another shot at showing up, so I'll see you then. Or not.
  7. G, you're my Hero!

Maria

• 1. Somebody get that man a doctor before he has a heart attack.
  2. Might is right and the Crew is all about might.
  3. Twenty years from now, nobody will remember your name. Twenty years from now, people will still remember the Crew and they'll still probably remember Maria Graziano.
  4. I'm in on any event that lists stabbing Harris as one of its party games.
  5. Clearly my brother has lost him damn mind if he thinks he's the best fighter in the family
  7. G, you're my Hero and I want to bear your children, seven of them!!

Tical

• 1. So, by virtue of winning the Warlord tournament again, I get to take another shot at the Crown.
  2. Considering everything should be in order by Tournament time, you can count me in, too. Shocking, I know.
  3. Crew now, Crew always.
  4. For those interested... read: everybody
  5. G, you're my Hero!

Chris

• 1. Time for the best fighter in the family to make an appearance. I'm in.
  2. I was starting to think nobody was man enough to challenge me.
  3. So Tony always says there's stories in the paper saying I've gotten chubby, out of shape, washed-up. One writer even had the nerve to call me Porky and the Cookie Monster.
  4. Let the record show that this victory was due to quickness, agility, and being nimble on my feet. My superior conditioning has paid off again.
  5. If you make it back up to our level, look us up then.
  6. G, you're my Hero!

Ria

• 1. Screw that s***.
  2. Ain't the built-in pizza-box tray on the armrest just the coolest thing?
  3. Yo
  4. Man, you suck. I'm challengin you where you gotta defend for yourself.
  5. F***!!
  6. G, you're my Hero!

Kheld

• 1. Alright then. I'll be in touch.
  2. I don't say much.
  3. I'll be there.
  4. G, you're my Hero!

Tony

• 1. For a second there with your offer of free drinks, I was startin to wonder who my favorite was gonna be.
  Then I remembered I dont pay for the drinks anyways.
  2. You two get a divorce yet?
  3. I want it cause when I beat up a Baron from my lowly position of commoner, Maria's head should deflate a bit.
  4. He should totally give the grant to me cause I drink lots of beer with him and still don't talk as poorly as that Wang guy.
  5. G, you're my Hero!

Jay

• 1. If the worst thing you have to say about me is that I'm a minor-league dueler, well...I must be doing something right in my life.
  2. The Crew P.R. dudes helped me write that letter. I'm not really all that eloquent.
  3. I thought we got this @#$&! out of the way years ago, when Prop 37 crashed and burned.
  4. Is team Magic Hands some kind of euphemism?
  6. G, you're my Hero!

[G]

Presenting: Rena Cronin!!
Special features and accessories:
Specially designed Bar for her casual leaning action.
3-6 Designer Coffee Mugs, two with special 'Shatter against Skull™' action!
Single and sixteen cup Mr Choco-Coffee™ coffee makers and bags of caffeinated Choco-Coffee Brand® Coffee.
Nod and Wave actions

Several Choice Phrases Including:

• 1. If I'm around, I'm in.
  2. If nothing comes up, I'll be there.
  3. Seems like it's pick on Rena week...so bring it.
  4. I would also, unless something comes up.
  5. If nothing keeps me away, count me in too.
  6. Decaf, if you would be so kind.
  7. Interesting.
  8. G is very hot, that's probably the only reason I talk to him.

And many more!

[Napoleon Bonarat]

I would like to order a Rena action figure and a Chris Graziano action figure (when it is out of production).

[G]

Presenting: The True PiRATe, NAPOLEON!!
Special features and accessories:
Removable tri-corner pirate hat so you can comb his ratty hair.
Toy pirate ship for Napoleon to play with in the bath.
Pile of plastic cookies. (Do not eat.)
Pile of plastic candy. (Do not eat. Really, Napoleon, don't eat it.)

Several Choice Phrases Including:

• 1. BADSIDE BRAWLERS!!! ARRR!!!
  2. I would love to play!
  3. As my first act as squire, I will petition the squires' council to cut down on all these confusing petition words. I will provide the candy.
  4. The format I choose is best of tunneling. Whoever can dig the best habitable tunneling system with only their teeth and claws wins.
  5. If I buy all the opals, I'll get a whole TEAM of meerkats!
  6. TAKE THAT, HYDRA!
  7. This is so great! Learning Taijiquan with Lena, then training with my mentor, Apple, I'm relaxed and clear minded so I can raid and sail the seven seas in harmony and balance!

And many more!