Robert Heys

[Robert Heys]

Achievement: Jade

Done - Lem

[DUEL Lem]

I went ahead and awarded the Jade achievement, but here is a link to the guidelines for requesting achievements.

[Robert Heys]

Achievement: Perfection
Date Accomplished: 11/12/2012
Chat: Outback
Misc:
[23:12:07] DUEL Lacey: MONEY 1: Ain't gettin' your hands on that. ( FA Dodge / Flip ) 1 Robert
[23:18:51] DUEL Lacey: MONEY 2: Guessin' he still doesnt' wanna be, you know, touched. ( FA Duck / Jab ) 2 Robert
[23:23:31] DUEL Lacey: MONEY 3: Shout to all my lost boys. We rowdy. ( Sweep / Flip ) 3 Robert
[23:28:05] DUEL Lacey: MONEY 4: Possible shutout incomin'. ( Jab / Uppercut ) 4 Robert
[23:37:07] DUEL Lacey: MONEY 5: Hey.. What's a seven letter word? Perfect. ( Flip / Jab )

Done - Lem

[Velhelmi Torvald]

Thanks for leaving my name off of there so no one would know that it was me who was humiliated. I love how on another post I wrote a long dramatic passage about wanting to win every match 5-0 in five and a week later you go and smack me down to humble me. But you didn't leave me humble enough where I wont tell people, "Yeah, he did it, but I'll take the credit for inspiring him to do it." j/k

Let me give the people at home a play-by-play reenactment of what happened...

1. Flip - Fancy Dodge

- This was a gymnastics competition and Robert, having been a Ballerina in high school was obviously the more gifted and naturally talented of us two in a pink tutu.



0-1 Robert

2. Jab - Fancy Duck

- In addition to dance, he also excelled in home economics, and was able to prepare a Duck a l'Orange for the price of some instant punch. I got some amazing French cuisine, he got powdered sugar drink from Nebraska. I clearly won here and thus earned points for tricking him into the one-sided trade.



~Vs~



2-1 Velhelmi

3. Flip - Sweep

- This is where the fight actually started. Eugene started to talk to me about how Robert played some guy named Scarecrow in a movie that had also featured an immobile Iron Man and Aslan who was suffering a severe lack of self confidence. As we started a dance-off, not only did he score for the better dancing, but also for being able to reinvent himself as a broom.



3-3 Velhelmi

4. Uppercut - Jab

- At this point, the caller clearly misrepresented the score because I actually hit myself here in order to give Robert a fighting chance. The caller erred so erroneously that she actually believed that Robert had scored the entire match.



4-0 Robert

5. Jab - Flip

- Robert clearly proved to the crowd and to me that he is, by far, the superior gymnast. I, however, punched him so hard that he split in two equal idiots.

10-4 Velhelmi

Velhelmi Torvald defeated Robert Heys 1,015-3 in 3 rounds.

After I won the match and the adoration of everyone in attendance and Harris kissed my feet and apologized for having not yet cleaned my feet with his hair. I told him it was okay, but to grow it out and leave the pastels out of them.



Then, at the end, I was so clearly embarrassed by my defeat, I mean clear and unadulterated victory, that I wrote this awesome post to conceal my shame.

In all seriousness though, good job on working me over, being the first person to perfect me in DoF and for getting the achievement. I still can't believe you flippin' Flip'd on round 5.

Maybe Velhelmi could learn something about fighting in pink tutu's...

[Robert Heys]

Achievement: Ruby
Date Accomplished: 11/16/2012

Done - Lem