Stress release and RP

[PrlUnicorn]

It's amazing how much we can learn from our children. Mostly, we learn whether or not we gave them the tools to survive on their own.

Yesterday, I took my son out to the mall for birthday shopping. My youngest turned nineteen yesterday, some days I think about that and go, eww... I'm old and others, I realize that a lot of the people his age have parents that are pushing sixty not fifty. However, I digress. We were in the car on the way to the mall and got into a discussion regarding what had happened on the previous day at the church goes to and volunteers with their youth group.

The main pastor, Pastor Rex, is a pretty open minded guy. His opinion on role playing games is that they are not evil. Robby, who is more or less a pastor in training, believes they are evil.

So, my son, who has been involved in some sort of role playing games since he was old enough to count spots on dice, had a long chat with Robby. In short, Tom told him that the games, in and of themselves, are not evil. The problems arise when people cannot distinguish the line between between the fantasy of role play and reality. It is not the fault of the game manufacturer that their product gets into the hands of people that get so caught up in a fantasy that instead of losing themselves temporarily in a game to relieve stress, they forget reality exists. Tom didn't tell me if he changed Robby's opinion in any way, but he did give my son the courtesy of listening. Not being able to discern that line is why, IMO, some people are of the mind that novels like Harry Potter and The Da Vinci Code are evil.

Interestingly enough, Robby advocated getting on boxing gloves and having a match with whomever has irritated you to help ease the stress, etc.. Seems like RPGs are not ok with him, but pounding the crap out of whomever annoyed you is ok. What about turn the other cheek? Or to paraphrase a friend of mine, doesn't sound very Christian to me. That's not a knock at Christians, it's just... beating on someone might ease your frustration and temper, but there are more constructive ways of coping. Yeah, so sayeth she with the short temper from hell.

Some of you might be familiar with a little card game called Munchkin. If you aren't, it's put out by Steve Jackson Games in Texas. (Yes, THAT Steve Jackson, the company that was raided by the Secret Service and won huge bucks in a lawsuit. ) Anyway, Tom took the game with him to play at the community center after services. Seems his way of dealing with stress (yelling, carrying on, and being generally silly while socializing with his friends) is less violent than what Robby suggested. Tom ended up explaining the game to him and why it was more fun that beating one someone with boxing gloves ... no one gets bruised under normal game circumstances.

So, this prompts a few questions:

What do you do to help relieve stress?

Since everyone here obviously roleplays, how do you handle it if people tell you that you are doing something evil?

And as corollary to that question, why do you think some people believe what's meant to be harmless fun, be it RPGs or any number of things, is evil?

[Artemus Kurgen]

Not to be coincidental..but I watched a movie concerning the lines between fantasy and reality blurring just this morning. "Mazes and Monsters" with Tom Hanks.

Anyway, like everyone I have to find ways to deal with stress and the biggest I found is Karate and Judo, the Sensei drills us till we're too tired to be stressed about things. lol and if not there's sparring on the mats.

Since everyone here obviously roleplays, how do you handle it if people tell you that you are doing something evil?

I remind them that when Christianity was gaining popularity the Church was telling the clueless masses Pegan's were evil and the vilagers ended up slaughtering the same people they went to for help in healing injuries and bringing their own children into this world. So what's really evil? A game that can't literally hurt you or a world symbol that gained power through the blood and deaths of innocent men and women who only ever used their knowledge of herbs and the like to help the people of their village? ::Just waiting for the fire and brimstone to come crashing down because of that answer::

And as corollary to that question, why do you think some people believe what's meant to be harmless fun, be it RPGs or any number of things, is evil?

Because they were deprived of such things as children, so they now walk in the footsteps of their parents who said much the same thing. Still..I believe there is a game out there for each kind of person, all ya have to to is find one that this person might like and bring them over to the good side of the gaming picket-line.

[Karen Wilder]

On a mild tangent... I love playing Munchkin!!! The table-top RP group I play with on Saturdays plays Munchkin a lot, usually early in the day if we know someone's going to be late.

For real stress relief... I sit in the music/art room at home, close the drapes and door so its very dark, and play my cello. Sometimes, if I'm incredibly upset or stressed out, my Fiance will play her flute for me.

Music is a huge part of my life. I have "driving music", "RPing music", "Dueling music"... even music to help me take a nap. Even most of the Anime that I watch, I originally got interested in because of the theme music.

[PrlUnicorn]

On a mild tangent... I love playing Munchkin!!! The table-top RP group I play with on Saturdays plays Munchkin a lot, usually early in the day if we know someone's going to be late.

For real stress relief... I sit in the music/art room at home, close the drapes and door so its very dark, and play my cello. Sometimes, if I'm incredibly upset or stressed out, my Fiance will play her flute for me.

Music is a huge part of my life. I have "driving music", "RPing music", "Dueling music"... even music to help me take a nap. Even most of the Anime that I watch, I originally got interested in because of the theme music.

Isn't Munchkin awesome?
Last time my son's group got together they all played. Eight people carrying on like maniacs. It was great! I keep telling my husband that he should haul out Illuminati, but he says that they aren't quite ready for it because it's pretty much the cut throat game from hell.

As for music, I still have that CD of very pretty music, done by you and your family, that you sent several years ago. It's very calming.

[Xenograg]

:: imagines what a game of Munchkin would look like at a RDI/RoH bash ::

(w) The horror....

[PrlUnicorn]

Because they were deprived of such things as children, so they now walk in the footsteps of their parents who said much the same thing. Still..I believe there is a game out there for each kind of person, all ya have to to is find one that this person might like and bring them over to the good side of the gaming picket-line.

You know, this is a great point. How many people didn't play House, Cowboys and Indians, Cops and Robbers, or any number of pretend games as children? I know I did. I never thought of not having done it as being deprived before, but there's a line in West Side Story that might apply here. "He's depraved on account of he's deprived."

[G]

What do you do to help relieve stress?

Since everyone here obviously roleplays, how do you handle it if people tell you that you are doing something evil?

And as corollary to that question, why do you think some people believe what's meant to be harmless fun, be it RPGs or any number of things, is evil?

1. I sit and watch TV drinking a cold, cold Pepsi. Usually the History channel, Bravo(if Celeb poker is on) Discovery and sometimes Cartoon Network. If I'm really, really upset or angry, I do heavy lifting like moving, or go through old stuff to see what I can get rid of. Otherwise, blowing stuff up in games helps wonders.

2. I let them know that their ignorance in the matter makes their opinion null and void. They are obviously letting themselves be led blindly by other higher than them who also are ignorant of what I do. As an aside, I'm not religious, don't beleive in any god, and won't let any religion dictate to me what I can and can't do. We have laws and common sense to tell right from wrong. If a religion is so threatened by a game, then there's something wrong with the religion.

3. People beleive RP is bad for two reasons. 1, Because when D&D first came out, it "advocated worshiping gods" For example, Forgotten Realms had a whole slew of gods to wosrhip. Oghma, Bhall, Myrkul, Bane, Mystra, AO, Helm, etc. This, therefore fell under whichever of the commandments that says "Thou shalt not have any other gods besides me." So, the religious fanatics out there found a target and stuck with it as very anti-religious and satanic, especially in the case of the "evil" gods.

The Second reason, 2, is due to ignorance. If the people against it could only realize it's a game like Monopoly, Cowboys and Indians, or, if you will, the type of RP that goes on in some peoples bedrooms including some of those Ultra Religious Fanatics who'd deny doing it out loud but behind closed doors do, they'd understand it's Only harmless fun. Role Playing is simply pretending to be something you are not. It's just in good fun.

A pet peeve of mine is this: Most types of people who will mock and make fun of the types of people who RP, LARP, go to Anime and Trek Conventions and dress up in midieval/anime outfits or go to Renn Faires are usually the Same people who get all hard core, painting their faces and bodys for their favorite football/soccer/baseball/basketball teams. It's the Same Thing.

[Amaltea]

I love Munchkin!!

I've never met anyone that says RPG games are evil. I think if someone did, I would say "Yes, and I'm the devil." Just for shock value.

What do I do for stress relief? Workout, manicure and pedicure. Pampering is good.

[Tsu Nami]

Gah, I feel like a little kid. That, and I don't feel like logging into my Neo name so that people recognize me easier.

I've never even heard of Munchkin. x_x I guess I can search wikipedia for it.

As far as my religious beliefs go, the only thing I believe is that gods exist. Maybe one, maybe some, maybe all of them. But that's as far as I go.

It really ticks me off when someone really narrow-minded like that calls D&D or RPing or other sorts of games evil. It's never happened to me before, so I don't really know what I'd do. I wouldn't blow up on them, but I would make my point known, I think.

As for stress, I usually don't do a lot about it, because a lot of the things I do can cause it. If I'm stressed, I'm not gonna go and work on the programming in my game, because I'll end up throwing my 19" CRT monitor. Or something inclement like that. I'll usually end up listening to music, or perhaps play a game. Like this morning... I woke up from this weird nightmare right into a bad mood. So I fired up my N64 Emulator and played some Diddy Kong Racing... until I got frustrated with that. Then I fired up Cave Story and played it for a while... until I got frustrated with that. And then I just played Wave Race on ridiculously easy difficulty with the easy racer. Easy things help me relieve stress.

[PrlUnicorn]

For those that are curious about Muinchkin http://www.sjgames.com/munchkin/game/

[Elijah]

Personally, I've always had an issue with organized religion, to me it's nothing but a control mechanism of society and I've always felt the weaker someone is the more they need religion to run their lives. Spirituality however is very important and you can be spiritual without being involved in a religion. Having a healthy sense of spirituality I think helps one to find ways to relax and relieve stress. In summary, go to temple and be happy. Temple is just different for everyone I guess.

And being someone who enjoys dressing up for Renn faires once in awhile and who is also a sport ehtusiast fan, the comment about the two being completely the same is completely wrong and typical prejudice fighting prejudice comments.

Someone who dresses up to be someone else is nothing at all the same as dressing up to support someone else in their envdevors.

[Xenograg]

My mother strongly disapproved of my time spent with role-playing games. She was right that I was not doing much else with my life, to include studying. She was wrong in that they were harmful (she believed a very religious friend over me.)

It was role-playing games that awakened my interest in history, philosophy, mythology, spirituality, magic, religion (comparitive), psychology, et. al. Just look at my web site!

I went from a person who hated reading to one that reads 2-3 books at a time. My mother lived long enough to see that, so I can say I won the argument.

They have definitely had a positive influence on my life.

[Grayson]

To relieve stress, I work out. Lifting to exhaustion is very satisfying and a good way to push out stress. Music is also wonderful.

I dated a girl in high school who was a religious nut. She asked me about my screen name one day, Zur030. I told her about M:tG and how my name came from the Zuran Spellcaster (my absolute favorite card, by the way. if i ever got back into it, it would be the foundation of my blue weenie deck ). She told me that the devil was working through me. Our relationship didn't last much longer.

I try to go to church on a regular basis, but I'm in no way a holy roller. Aside from that one instance, no one's ever given me a hard time about role playing. I get made fun of at work sometimes, but it generally stops when I introduce them to OOTS, CAD or PA. I think I'm off topic and rambling now. Oh well. I don't really get bothered when people make fun of me for gaming and role playing or call me the devil or anything. I enjoy it, so who cares what they think?

[PslyderFTA]

Relieving stress? I've got several venues.

Computer games, table-top RPG's (AD&D, Rifts/Palladium, Shadowrun), building various mid-level-for-most-but-kick-@$$-for-me M:tG decks, a whole slew of Transformers, and a desk full of Legos. I personally like making Transformers out of the Star Wars sets. I also do live-action medieval style combat. (www.durdemarion.com, www.belegarth.com) Look real close, folks. . .you might see a twelve year old picture of me on there. . .

As for RPG's in my history. . .my mother, when I first started playing, was very much worried, thinking "Oh, that's demonic, that's devil worship, oh what's my poor son getting into. . ."

So I invited her to sit in on one of our games.

It's amazing how quickly that will change someone's opinion. Hers went from "it's evil!!" to "Oh geez, it's just a bunch of (undeniably) fat kids playing pretend." That very same year, she decided AD&D was a suitable Christmas present. The folks at the gaming store dang near threw a party.

I am, however, happy to say that I don't have a whole lot of stress anymore. I cut glass for a living. Stress causes mistakes. ::chuckle::

[Jaleeisa]

Ahhh...one of my favorite topics! I grew up in a house where I could listen to Country music all I wanted, but Rock was the tool of Satan. I seems that all the "done wrong" and "cheating spouse" and "gonna kick their butt" songs along with "crying in my beer" and "drinking til I can forget" was better than rock lyrics for me. I never really understood that much. I finally got to start listening to Loverboy and Journey when I was in my mid-teens.

As I grew older, I realised that I had gained a good backgrounding in religions. Yes, that was plural. My Grandpa was Nazerine. My Mom was Baptist. Then changed religions to Assembly of God after we were trapped in the Baptist sanctuary during a knock down drag out fight between the preacher's son and the deacons when the deacons started an arguement on Sunday morning because the preacher would not condone the head deacon's shady business practices. Well, the searmon didn't start out nor end with that point, but it did involve not fleecing your neighbors or fellow community members and the deacon, having a guilty conscience took it as pointed and attacked, verbally, then physically, the preacher in question. A preacher that to this day I still deeply believe to be one of the few true men of the cloth that I've ever met.

So, here I am, rasied in two of the most repressed religious, and suddenly a part of hand raising, tongues speaking worshipers. I was a preteen at this point and realised that each religion has it's good and bad points. This was due to the fact that our teen minister gave us a three year backgrounding in various other religions. We literally studied them in our class on Wednesday nights with all our parents' approval. The premise was that we should understand other religions because when you understand what a man holds dear, you understand that man. Oh, and add to all this that I grew up in SW Louisiana, where the Catholic reglion is not only alive and well, but thriving.

So, here I was, grounded in several religions, growing up in a strict household.. what do I do? Start playing D&D tabletop from virtually the moment it came out. My mother was appalled at first. Then my teen minister pointed out that it was harmless as long as I remembered the lines between fantasy and reality. Something both of them held me to.

Then, many years ago I got my first home PC and found the RP areas on AOL. It was like coming home with the added benefit of creative freedom without all the rules and creative writing as well. Plus, my love of mythology came into play. I brought along three of my best loved and longest lived tabletop characters.

Many people, including my Mom, Dad and new husband don't understand my love of RPG. My children do, all of them having their bedtime stories consist of Greek and Roman myths rather then the normal/usual type stories from the Brothers Grimm. And learning to tabletop as soon as they could really read, write and understand the game. My last two children were sat on my lap while I played or called and typed their first jibberish to some of you. Several long time playing friends also kept close tabs on my last pregnancy and labor pains while I called duels. And a few requested calls as soon as the baby was born and heard his first cries. My children, rather than being harmed by all of this, have developed into very creative, resorceful individuals with several different gifts that still awe me when I read their writings, or see something they have drawn or listen to my daughter play something on her clarinet that she'd composed. Or watch my eight and six year old sons write their own stories and illustrate them. Not professional quality, perhaps, but still amazing to me to see in children so young.

Evil? No. I've made so many dear friends here and through my tabletopping. Friends that understand and enjoy the creative processes. So many who also use this wonderful venue to relieve stress, to unwind or to blow off steam when needed. People who also use this venue to explore things both dark and light they would like to be able to do themselves, but the rules of society keep them from exploring. How many of us have played things like theives, assassians or slavers? Things we would not or could not explore in the real world for concern about the law, or harming our fellow man? It's not that we are evil in our souls, it it that dark and light both exist and we are human. And I find this a much better place and way to explore those aspects of nature than in the real world where someone can be hurt.