Torpor Visitation Dreams

[Sylista Convor]

2020-09-23 - 23:00 Rhy’din Standard Time

”Sylista…”

The world the Runelord found herself in was familiar to her now. The shimmer that surrounded her created an icy white backdrop, only the path she needed to follow void of the oppressive weight of that thick air.

”Sylista…”

That voice! It sounded so familiar!

Sylista took her first step down the path, a focused expression on her face as she listened so very carefully for the feminine sound, trying to source who it was. It was not Vael’rys, Leila, or anyone who immediately came to mind. The voice sounded like it was dancing around her rather than just carried in the air.


She continued on.

”Adalyssa…”

That haunting name had her stopped dead, eyes narrowing in the direction set out before her. There were so few people who knew that name and not one of them was someone she wanted to see at this time. “Who are you?” The question rang out into the air, the words thick with emotion: anger, fear, and sadness.

”Come find me…

Narrowed eyes quickly turned a single brow arching. That expression was something she shared with Mathian, The first letter exchange being the first moment that led the two of them down the path they finally felt comfortable on. Finally found love. That expression was theirs which made this some kind of cruel joke to her.


Instead of saying a word, the Runelord moved forward, blue-grey irises turning crimson and the cuspid teeth elongating. She became more of a predator than prey in that moment and she carried on down the path.

”Phoenix…”

Whomever the familiar voice was that rang out in this part of the veil knew her well. Better than she felt comfortable in. Soon, the slow and cautious steps turned into quick ones that had her moving with purpose.

She was going to get to the bottom of this, whether it was dangerous or not.

“Next I will hear you say-”

”Little Firebird…”

That interruption was enough and she pushed against the ball of her foot, using that to spring her forward in a rapid movement, faster than the untrained eye could keep up with. She sprinted down the path, headlong into whatever danger faced her.

That was, at least, until she found herself looking in a tall and wide mirror at… herself? Or, rather, a version of her that held herself in a way that indicated she grew up without the years of damage, pain, and growing resentment that Sylista felt.

“You are not me, what trickery is this!”

The individual in the box smirked and stepped through the mirror against the wall, and took a step forward. “No, sister, I am not. Yet, in some worlds the merged in the Worldbinding event, I am that world’s version of you. In others, you are the version of me. Neither could -”

“Reconcile, leaving me in Rhy’din. Indigo?”

“Reconcile, leaving me on…” she paused, smiling at Sylista in that same enigmatic way that the vampiric Runelord had. “Yes, Adalyssa, it is me. Indigo.”


The vampire rushed forward to wrap her identical twin in a hug, the first time the girls had ever seen each other face to face in either of their timelines. The hug was returned and the two held each other for more moments than expected by either of them. This was their moment.

When they finally released, Indigo looked at Sylista and sighed sadly. “We have much to discuss. Come, have a drink with me and talk. I need to tell you about Avitoria.”

[Sylista Convor]

“I am glad she is safe but, Indigo, how did you end up with Avitoria here?”

The two women had spent hours seated across from each other, the glasses in front of them filled with their favourite beverages never emptying as they spoke. Indigo Val Orden spoke of the difference between her timeline and the one Sylista lived and the life she had made for herself in the world she ended up in followed by Sylista explaining about Gideon, Mathian, and Rhy’din. The two were so different.

“I heard a baby crying in a dream weeks ago and a boy no older than eleven came to me in a world that looked so very much like this one. He told me that the child, Avitoria, needed support and distance from what could harm her.” The woman sipped her hot chocolate, hands cupped around the steaming mug as if it was the only thing keeping her warm in the shimmering world. “The next thing I knew, I woke up pregnant. The boy, he called himself Felix, came to me often, trying to explain to me the situation and support me through the strange process.”

Sylista, who was holding her wine glass daintily between her fingers, placed the glass full of the dark red liquid back on the table and placed two fingers against her temple. “Felix was my son, born and handed to my sister-by-choice because of my belief I would be unable to care for him and his sister. He came to me when Mathian saved my life by granting me the Embrace and let me hold her. It was supposed to be goodbye between us, Avitoria and I and Felix and I.” She paused, her face turning dark. “Will I ever be able to hold her?”

Indigo shook her head slowly, sadness mirroring her twin’s darkness. “I am afraid not, Ada. Not as she is. My responsibility as her surrogate mother is to ensure that the chaos and evil that created her is not capable of steering her down a path. She is the child of a Flameweaver and a necromancer, not to mention a human and a demon. Avitoria Iome Val Orden-Ravenwood is to remain here, free of any dark influence, until she is old enough to make the decision for herself.” She paused, kicking up the side of her mouth in a sympathetic half-smile. “Besides, do you truly believe she would be safe without some separation from this knife-wielding psychopath you spoke of?”

Sylista knew, of course, that Indigo was right, but it was tough to process nonetheless. She sat, running fingers over the lip of the glass in front of her, and sighed. “I have a letter I had been reading the two of them while I carried them in Rhy’din that was given to us by my adoptive father. If I read it out to you, would you act as a scribe to ensure Avitoria knows how loved she is? At least, until she is old enough to read and then give her the letter when she is old enough to understand? I…” Sylista trailed off, a carmine tear rolling down her cheek. “I miss him, Indigo. He was the first man who cared for me like that without some motive to seize my title.”

Indigo nodded, still smiling at her sister with sympathy. “Of course, Adalyssa,” she reached out with that warm hand and placed it on top of the cool skin of the closest arm. “I intend on the little one knowing how loved she is from day one. Do you have the letter memorized? I can use my wit endowments to hold the memory and-”

“Act as a Days.” The two responded in stereo, speaking over each other.

“Of course,” she replied, feeling some measure of relief. Her daughter may never know her, but she would know of her and that would be enough. She waited until Indigo was seated comfortably and focused on her before she started to recite the letter she had read every night for the last month:

Hello, Mari. Hello Avi. This is your Grandpa.

I know it probably feels weird getting a letter from somebody who’s not around anymore. But that’s ok. It feels weird for me too, writing to someone I won’t ever get to meet.

I’m writing to you because I have a few things I need you to do for me as you grow up.

As you grow older, the world will seem like a very mean and dark and unfriendly place. And sure, some parts of it are like that. But not all of it. The world can be beautiful. It can be full of kindness and love and hope. And all you have to do to make that happen is spread it.

Be kind. Always be kind. Help other people whenever you can. Even strangers. Even people who are mean to you sometimes. Sometimes, all it takes is a little bit of kindness to turn a mean person into a nice one.

Listen to your mom. She knows best. And never, ever be afraid to talk to her when you need to.

Listen to your dad, too. Sometimes. When he’s earned it.

Don’t worry about making your Grandpa proud. I’m already proud of you. And I always will be. And any time you feel sad, or lonely, just read this letter again. And remember that I’m always looking down on you with a smile. I’m right there with you. And I always will be.

I love you, Mari. I love you, Avi.

From Grandpa.

Indigo allowed the message to process before she nodded at Sylista. “That was beautiful. You are very lucky. Now, they are going to start trying to bring you back to consciousness soon. Love Marishka like she is your everything. Ensure she is cared for constantly by people warmer than you, and remember, please, that you are everything that little girl needs and she will be everything you need and more.”

Sylista could feel the oppressive weight lifting from around her, a sign that she was returning to the land of the (mostly) living. She nodded to Indigo, her own presence becoming more and more transparent. “Will I see you again?”

“Just call for me, and I will be here for you.”

---

Sylista’s eyes blinked open and she saw the bag of blood dripping into an IV for her. Pressed against her was the little bundle of Mari and seated in a chair on the other side of the infant was Betty. “Oh,” Sylista murmured to herself, feeling the weight of the drugs used to keep her under lift as quickly as the one in the veil did when it was time to return.

Betty snapped her focus on to Sylista and started rambling about how happy she was that the vampiric Runelord and her child were safe, no mention of Avitoria made. Her phone was out and the fingers were flying across keys as she tried to set up visitation with family or trying to ensure Mathian would know Sylista was awake. Instead of replying (or even focusing on what was said), she stared off into space, waiting for her body to process the pain drugs, and started petting Mari’s hair.

Everything was going to be alright.

[Sylista Convor]

This morning’s visit to the veil felt different. The way the path wound was different than the one that usually took her to Indigo, though she knew she had walked this way before. She had been told she was granted forgiveness and to stop being so difficult in this section of the world that straddled life and death.

She did not listen to the advice. Instead, she followed her own mind and heart.

The Runelord tried to step out of this particular dream world and found herself unable to leave. As there had never been a reason to leave the regular visits with her Water touched sister, Sylista was unsure if this time was different or if it was always like this. If it was different, was there a reason for it?

”Caelum, I know you are out there, show yourself.” A beat. ...please?” If there was any fear of Caelum after their parting while she was in Mystaria, it did not carry in her voice that drifted through the haze. There was just a concern that she would be stuck here without some form of resolution.


”You know, I thought seeing you in your current state would not have taken my breath away like it just did,” the man’s happy voice echoed around her as he stepped out of the shadows in front of her. ”I cannot even force myself to hate you.”

There was a small, two-person table that appeared in their space from within the swirling opaque air and the Runelord let out a silent ‘thank you’ aimed at no particular direction as she sat and waved regally to her former lover to join her. ”I wish I could say the same about you. I am happy to see you and find your presence soothing nonetheless.”

Gideon did sit, crossing one leg over his knee, and stretched himself to take up as much space as possible at the small table. He arched a golden eyebrow at Sylista and waited.

The moments of silence between them were as oppressive as the heavy air and she could feel herself choking despite the lack of need for air after her evolution. ”If I start with an apology, would you accept it?”

”That would depend on the apology.

”Right,” came the reply, her tone neutral. ”I suppose that is fair, I have a lot to apologize for.”

The man chuckled and sat more comfortably, a cup of strong coffee appearing before him. He gave her a long look and then sighed. ”Firebird, my darling Firebird. You have less to apologize for than you think. If you had told me that you discovered what was best for you instead of slamming the door to your heart in my face, I would have taken it better. That is all.” He shook his head slowly, looking at her with sad eyes. ”When you returned and I saw you for the first time, I was acting in a way I hoped helped us both reconcile. You see, there were memories in my mind where I never loved you at all. Worse yet, at least for me? There were memories where I did not know you or any version of you. My life was made better because you were in it, Sylista. Whether I was with you or because I just knew you. I was happier in the memories where you were present.”

It was like she was winded by his words, the choking sensation moving from her throat to her chest. ”I am vexed by you, Caelum. You should, by all rights, wish my head on a pike. What keeps you so kind?”.

He shrugged non-committedly and gave her an enigmatic smile that was so well-honed by those raised in the courts of Rofehavan. ” What is the point of harbouring hate in my heart when you need something more right now? Friends, compassion, and support are things we all failed to give you and I believe we can better serve you as an accessible point of contact to help you become better.”

”...what about my activities that occur after dark? The ones-”

”The ones Avitoria’s father taught you? The ones you use to soothe your mind after you physically changed? The offered statements were said with a surprising amount of warmth. ”How is any of that different than the work you used to do with Vael’rys to protect your friends and country? I know what you hunt and who you kill. It is almost… admirable.”

With a sniff of a laugh, she shook her head. ”It was once I was in Rhy’din that I learned the difference between love and a desire to be in good company with people who treat me well. I also know the difference between love and friendship; friendship and just an ally.” It was clear the woman was trying to be sensitive and kind while still firm about her feelings. ”I did love you and I apologize for saying it was not real. It was, but it was the kind of love that granted me a chance to feel secure and get my feet underneath me to become the person I am today. You deserved better and I hope you found it.”

The air around them started to lighten again and she knew their time was growing short. He must have understood as well because he held up a hand to address the present rather than the past before their moment was gone. ”I will be here for you because I love you, you were my best friend for those years together. You need not worry about my lack of support, okay? Just… be careful. Your daughters need you more than our children ever did. Paxton and Felix had Vael and Dred to guide them and you are in a better place now.”

The world continued to fade as he spoke until it just left a damp, icy chill on her skin and the sound of a goodbye was barely heard, Soon, there was nothing around the vampiric Runelord but the soft bed and smooth sheets against her cool skin.

”Have I been in Rhy’din so long that my friends are crossing the veil? There really is nothing left in that world for me.”

Rather than fretting about it, she sat up and set out to find her daughter. Something about that girl always granted her an unflappable sense of calm when she was in Sylista’s arms.

[Sylista Convor]

“What was he like?” Caelum looked across the table to the petite Runelord who seemed to be shifting in her chair. The conversation of their next visit had turned from the twins they had created together to the girls she made with others too quickly for her to feel as though the conversation was following a natural flow and it must have shown on her face because the man shrugged at her. “Humor me? I am simply curious.”

Sylista sighed, wishing there was anything other than the man across from her that was worth staring at. It might have been the point of this strange veiled world.

“As you used past tense, I assume you do not mean Mathian.” She sighed, shaking her head slowly as the feelings filled her chest. “I met Avitoria’s father, Viktor, in a park by coincidence. My dear friend, Bellamere would tell me the meeting was due to fate’s guiding hand or some manner of foolishness.” She paused, looking down at her hands cupping the hot cup of tea in front of her. “I should not be so cold. I like the idea that I was destined to have my daughters.”

The corner of the man’s mouth kicked up, his throat making a small laugh noise that resonated with the bass of his vocal sounds. “Viktor and Avitoria? Coincidence?”

“No.”

“Of course not. Did you pick it?” The man seemed unfazed by her single word answers. He knew what she was feeling right now, even after all these years later.

“Yes.” The reply was softer this time. Her initial edge started to melt away.

Caelum canted his head, an eyebrow raised, and he lifted his hand with his palm raised as if to encourage her to continue.

So she did.

“We met in a park, I was holding the locket Vael gave me with the twin’s faces inside, and he… we... “ another sigh. “The conversation was thrilling. I felt seen. We exchanged methods of communication and, in a pain-addled state, we negotiated a child. I thought I was kidding and, yet, I arranged with Gideon’s lover to have my body healed.” A beat. “It worked too well.”

That eyebrow raised again and he chuckled. “Are you intentionally avoiding answering what he was like? You speak of how not why.”

A (warm) delicate hand lifted to scratch at her forehead as she thought. “You are right, of course. No one has asked me to respond to the question of who and meant it in such a strangely professional way.” With a smile, she continued. “He was not someone who wished to show the light within me through cracks that could be exploited. He wanted me to be myself authentically, and he wanted me to live my best life, with or without him. I truly felt seen when I was with him.”

“Interesting. Do you love him?”

“I thought I did, once. For a time.” There was an odd expression on her face. “This is the first time I have really needed to sort out these feelings. I… tend to push them down in order to not dwell on something I can never have.”

“What is it you want that you cannot obtain, Sylista?” The man, instead of looking concerned or jealous, looked awestruck. “You are so self-aware and confident about the matter of the heart.”

“I have spent so many days of my life alone, thinking about what love is and what love looks like. I have had to, especially at this point in my life.”
She did not mean the statement as a jab or a means for Caelum to feel poorly about their lack of a relationship when they met again. He could see it. Instead of responding in a knee-jerk method that so many men would have had in the same situation, this man just nodded. “Continue?”

“I love a part of him that is similar to the love I have for you for helping me create Paxton and Felix. I owe him a level of… something for the creation of something so beautiful and for the moments together where we were happy. I took him camping once.” The rapid change in direction was followed with an amused smile. “I wore trousers for three days, which ended up filthy because we were too close to the river.”

“You know better,” Caelum replied with narrowed eyes. “Why would you have done that?”

She dipped her head down, a sad smile on her lips that was exposed as fingers ran through her obsidian waves. “I- I wanted to give him a chance to correct me or for me to use my magic to dry the earth as a means to show off. Either would have been fine, instead… we had fun. Together. Even though we both had an unspoken understanding that the site was wrong and this was probably the last time we were going to spend together. Now I am left with a love for the idea of him. It just is not enough.”

She looked up at her former lover through thick lashes, the sadness in her eyes indicating how heartbreaking this was for her. “I was never enough just as I was and I never could be. I refused to give myself up to him. Not completely.” Lifting that glass to her lips, she sipped the contents slowly, not really tasting the tisane. ”He asked me to leave Mathian so I could share him with a man I hate. I refused.”

“Understandably so,” Caelum replied. “How did it end?”

“A quiet goodbye in his parlour, a few shed tears, and he left my world. I could find him, I just… I cannot bring myself to.”

There was a silence between Caelum and Sylista, it dragged out as the two of them sat across from each other and tried to find words to say to the other. In the end, it was Caelum who broke first, a soft smile that was authentic right down to the lines next to his eyes. “Thank you for trusting me, Sylista. I know you tend not to do that. I am sorry your heart has never been guarded the way it should be by those who have claimed to love you. You do have love now, and it sounds like there is so much of it.”

“You are correct, and I try not to forget that. It is hard sometimes.” With a shrug, she looked down and then up again. “I feel authentic love now, and it is given and received. My daughter, Mari, is beautiful with the most captivating blue-green eyes and she makes the happiest noises when she sees us. I love the life I have now and would not trade it for anything.”

Caelum nodded slowly, finally hit by the words she said. “Of course, you deserve only the best, Little Firebird.”

Sylista sighed and stood, walking around the small bistro-style table they sat at and placed a hand on Caelum’s shoulder. “Thank you for being the one to show me that I deserve to feel safe and to find a love that helps me feel that way.”

She placed a soft kiss on his temple and the world around her disappeared in a rush, leaving her unsettled as she moved from laying down on the chaise to sitting upright, the tips of her left pointer and middle finger rested over her eyebrow. Those departures from the veil were enough to almost make her feel ill.

After taking a moment to recover, she stood and wandered the property to seek out her fiance, wanting nothing more than to tell him just how much she loved him and to thank him for creating a space for her to flourish rather than fade, growing with him rather than wilting away beside him.

She really was lucky. She could have settled and lived unhappily ever after, or whatever the opposite of the books the nurses read Mari said.

No. She was happy.