Ghost in the Mirror

[Ellie Luisante]

It's 9 AM on December 14, 2021, and Neo Eternity is walking into his office in the Seraphim Knights headquarters in New Prism.

It's a humble office. It's got just enough space to talk to several people at once comfortably, and the blue accents and decor all around speak to his personality and confer a calming vibe. He did not get as much sleep as he would have liked. He got called out to the Arena after a late night incident caused Ellie's distress beacon to go off. And during his investigation there, he discovered something troubling.

He needs to talk to someone. A very important someone. He will need to set aside time in his schedule for it. He grabs his tablet from his desk and swipes through his appointments. Ah, the follow-up session with Ellie. After a troubling duel with Szuzak, she wasn't sure how she felt about continuing to be an adventurer, so they spent some time talking about it. He is making the executive decision to cancel that follow-up. She is not well enough for it. She's probably not well enough for any other jobs, either. Not even baking. So he calls them up and requests that she have the day off on her behalf. Then he sends Ellie a text message.

NE: I'm canceling our session today. I've also called off at the bakery on your behalf as well. Rest well.

That should give him enough time... to speak with the Lord of Spirits.

He has to keep a few other appointments first, and keep them he does, but he soon returns to his office for this very important meeting. He takes a deep breath, and begins to focus his energy. Lights of all four cardinal elements swirl up around him. "Ancient ruler of the elements. I summon thee. Come, Maxwell!" He points his hand out to an empty area of the room, and the air splits open, pouring light forth.

A beautiful woman steps through, with an elegant white, black, and blue skin-tight dress covered in black and gold gear motifs, and long blonde hair that reaches down to her knees. Her bangs are accentuated by one particularly long shock that takes a swoosh shape, teal at the tip. Vibrant magenta eyes briefly take in her surroundings before falling upon Neo.

This woman is the Lord of Spirits for the Aselian pantheon: Maxwell.

She crosses her arms and looks at her summoner expectantly, almost irritatedly. She speaks with a deep, feminine voice that has a touch of regality. "Neo, you know better than to summon me on a whim. So why am I standing in your office?"

Neo chuckles, and shakes his head. "That's kind of cute, when you're the one who has some explaining to do."

Her expression hardens into more distinct irritation. "What cause do you have to take such a tone with me?"

"You ever hear of a lady named Elina Luisante? We all just call her Ellie. Adorable human, super twirly." Neo's expression grows smug.

Maxwell, on the other hand, appears to have had a different nerve struck just then, as if she has been caught stealing from the cookie jar, and only just barely managed to hide her guilt. Her irritation has lightened. "Why would I know anything about this woman?"

Neo sits on his desk and starts tapping at the air with a finger, almost like a metronome. "She got into a bit of a scuffle last night, way out of her league. Apparently, she put herself between one Emiria Burke, and one Jaycy Ashleana. One of whom is a freedom fighter from another timeline who can swing around a four-ton sax case, and one who is partially draconic and full of power and experience. A fight she should not be part of at all. And yet... there she was. And then she ended up overexerted and burnt out, with her distress beacon active, which caused me to discover her. Now, why do we suppose she would possibly get into a fight she has no business being part of?"

The Lord of Spirits has now taken on a new sort of irritation, because she doesn't want to be kept waiting. "Proof, Neo. Where is your proof that I was involved in this?"

Neo sighs and cuts to the chase, frowning a smidge. "I found traces of your energy in the Arena in one particular spot."

Maxwell seems legitimately shocked. "You... what? How?"

The angel hops off his desk and paces about as he explains. "Maxwell, I can feel deific energy now. Anubis nearly wrecked my entire ass a while back to try and prove a point to me. At that point, I committed completely to learning how to feel it. That by itself should not allow me to feel the energy of any god, of course. But one specific god with whom I have long held a summoning pact, and performed various duties for? Well, that's a god I am honored to know very well, so of course I know what her energy feels like. When it appears somewhere it shouldn't be, that's easy enough for me to notice. And when Ellie mentions having heard 'a voice' before momentarily blacking out and doing something uncharacteristic, well... two plus two is four."

"..." Maxwell has been caught, and she knows it.

"..." Neo is just waiting for her to fess up.

She sighs defeatedly. "Fine, Neo. The jig is up. It was me." The Lord of Spirits throws her arms up in surrender. Her machinations foiled by a mere mortal! "What do you want to know? Do keep in mind that I have no obligation to tell you."

Neo shakes his head, and his finger, in a tut-tut motion. "If I feel that your actions interfere with the vow that I made when we formed our pact, then I believe you do in fact have obligation to tell me." In order for someone to be able to summon an Aselian spirit, a pact is necessary, unless you are a Keeper of the sprit's element. And a pact requires a vow. The pact can be annulled by someone else if the pactmaker violates the vow. "You remember my vow, right? And I'm sure you understand how direct influence over the actions of one of my adventurers interferes with that vow."

Another sigh, this one in exasperation. "Damnit. That's two for two. Fine. I'll tell you everything you want to know." Maxwell crosses her arms. "So, where are we getting started?"

Neo taps a finger to his chin. "Let's start from last night and go backwards. Why did you have Ellie Soul Charge and get in the middle of Mira and Jaycy? It seems like that action put her directly in potential harm's way."

Maxwell tilts her head in consideration. "Well, let me answer that by asking you this: have you ever seen Ellie angry? As in, just... completely, absolutely go off on someone?"

"Well, would you consider telling off Jackson after Mira's challenge to fit that description?" Because he has seen that. Watched it on the stream.

She shakes her head. "No, this was much more severe than that."

Neo nods somberly, because he had a feeling that was the answer. "That's... the impression I got from last night. I didn't think she was capable of really losing it on someone."

"And yet, it happened. She has been helping House Adia with the whole leaked dossier problem, and being emotionally invested in that. During Mira's challenge to Jackson, she went off on him about it, which you know about. Then Mira was talking about challenging Hope, which caused Jaycy to threaten her, and Ellie to become concerned about it. And Jaycy threatening her girlfriend was also kind of embarrassing for her, because she made that plush for that contest."

Neo grimaces. Depending on where you fall on this, it's either really embarrasing to own that Jaycy plush, or really cool.

Maxwell continues. "Then Szuzak loses himself in power while trying to claim one of her spells during what was supposed to be a normal duel, the night before. Then there's the part you missed: there was a fae visitor who made one particular friend of theirs very uncomfortable, and the throuple was trying to defuse that. And then there was Jaycy. Ellie was initially planning on trying to talk down the whole thing, but Jaycy instigated. That was the straw that broke the dancer's back."

Neo is visibly cringing. "Holy crap, I don't think even I could handle that sort of stress."

"I was a mortal spirit before I became Maxwell. There was no way I could have handled it back then." She doesn't want to admit that she's not even sure she could now.

"So Ellie snapped..."

"...because of the part you found out about last night. Ellie wanted to help Mira just talk them out of it. What you don't know is that this was because Maggie warned Ellie that Mira could be in real danger. So Mira was happy to try for her lover's sake, but Jaycy kicked the proverbial hornet's nest on purpose. Ellie's attempts at diplomacy fell flat first with the fae visitor, and then again with Jaycy. So that was the spark that set her off."

Neo narrows his eyes in suspicion. "You sure do know a lot about what's going on with her. It's like you're watching her."

Maxwell tilts her head to the side a bit. "That is not... untrue, but it is not always true. I have no reason to watch her mundane moments or her intimate moments."

The guild leader shakes his head. "I appreciate that you're not spying on my friend and adventurer while she's living her best polyamorous life. Anyways... she was just going off verbally. How does this lead to your intervention?"

The Lord of Spirits nods. "Good question, and I am getting to that now. The problem is, now that Jaycy has straight up picked a fight with Mira, the argument was escalating very quickly, and Mira found herself in a ring with Jaycy. Jaycy threatened to destroy Mira if she hurt Hope." She sighs. "What I was worried about at this point was... Ellie was already over the edge, and pretty much out of her mind because everything was going badly, and Jaycy was threatening her lover's life... over dueling."

Neo blinks a few times, thinking, and then his eyes widen. "Ellie's moral code."

Maxwell points at him, as if to say bingo, and nods. "Yes. There are... layers to this, like an ogre."

"Don't you mean an onion?"

"No. ...Anyways, we know that Ellie finds violence as a means of settling interpersonal conflicts strongly objectionable. We also know that she looks at dueling in a different way than many others do, even as she holds a title herself. Ellie did not feel that Mira wanted to hurt Hope, merely duel her for a title, because of Hope's test intercession during the Overlord challenge."

Neo sits back down on his desk, crosses his arms, and fills in the blanks. "And Ellie does not necessarily view dueling as violence, because she does not duel violently herself, and knows that Mira is very well capable of dueling with restraint."

"That's correct... but you watched the Overlord challenge and saw for yourself, right? Mira did not show restraint against Hope. She had intended to use that four-ton saxophone case on Jackson, but ended up using it on Hope, too. So Jaycy was picking a fight in order to protect her lover from harm. I do not know if Mira intended to duel roughly with Hope on the second encounter, but Ellie was likely almost certain that she didn't. She didn't watch the challenge. She was dancing that night, and she had no reason to care about Jackson and Salvador's duel. So I don't know if she ever found out that Mira used the sax case unncessarily." Neo nods, putting more pieces together. Maxwell continues, "Anyways, Jaycy was threatening Mira's life over what was, in Ellie's eyes, just a duel, just a title. I didn't know how her psyche was going to respond to that. I am very much invested in its preservation. She could have broken down in a really bad way that night, due to being torn apart in the conflict. ...So instead, I made the decision to force her to take action."

"So you had her activate Soul Charge and get between them."

"...Actually, the only thing I told her to do was to intercede. Upon receiving that command, she activated Soul Charge and got between them herself. But my influence gave her a bit of a... surge. I was unable to maintain control, though." Maxwell ponders on how to word this. "I was... shaken off." Neo isn't quite ready for the full truth just yet. He might be in a few minutes, but she figures it best to take it piece by piece.

He can tell that Maxwell is holding back the entire truth, but is pretty much on the same page as her, and wants to adequately process all the pertinent information in order. He sighs. "So that's the story of what happened that night. You gave her a command to get between Mira and Jaycy because you thought it would hurt her less than if you didn't." Maxwell nods. "Did you stop for a moment to consider the possibility that Jaycy might have retaliated violently for that sort of interference?"

She nods again. "I did, in fact, stop for a moment. It is no secret that Ellie is a Seraphim Knight. If Jaycy hurts her, not only does she have to deal with Mira and Kira in a real fight... she has to deal with you, and likely also Jin, in a real fight."

This causes Neo to smirk, and shake his head. "While I appreciate the vote of confidence, I really wish you didn't stake Ellie's safety on active duelists' respect for the power of a literal has-been, and his brother who has never held rank, in a real fight."

"It worked out." Maxwell shrugs. "Anyways, how do you feel about all this?"

Neo frowns, and tilts his head. "I don't know. Jaycy's goal is very transparent here. She is trying to get Mira to challenge her instead of Hope, as a means to avoid Hope getting hurt. But you could accomplish the same just by asking Mira not to use that sax case. I am almost certain that her grudge against Hope is strictly within the sport, and due to how Ellie feels about violence, Mira would be forced to comply. If Jaycy wanted to use Ellie, that would be a more effective way to do that. But she instead chose to be overly provocative with death threats instead, which kind of grinds my gears with the whole... excessiveness of it. The ends are understandable, but the means were unreasonable."

Maxwell replies, "This sort of vitriolic adversity harkens back to older days. Threatening consequences outside of the sport for actions taken in the sport was commonplace back then."

The has-been duelist sighs exasperatedly and shakes his head. "Yeah, and I hated that." But he knows there are people who would definitely like to see that part of the old days come back.

The Lord of Spirits shakes her head, too. "Don't get me wrong, I agree with you. I find it profoundly boorish and classless."

Neo nods in accord, then resumes considering the situation with Ellie. He thinks he's just about done processing what has immediately happened, and now it's time to reach further back. He crosses his arms and taps his foot idly, then after a few more seconds, "...I suppose Ellie's therapist will have a much easier time with her once they find out she doesn't actually have schizophrenia, huh?"

Maxwell grimaces briefly, then chuckles, and nods. She figured he might extrapolate that conclusion, and she is ready to come clean with everything she knows.

"Alright, then. Why are you in her head, Maxwell? And who else is in there?"

[Ellie Luisante]

You are just having a regular night in Rhy'Din. You're talking with your friends, drinking a diet broot. You give Maggie a big, soft hug, and Amaris too. You smile to Salvador and the Gatito. The former upnods with the hint of something resembling a smile, while the latter is happy to just smile outright. Dris plays music, and you and Rhys dance to it. You breathe in Azalea's pleasant fragrance, and you receive encouragement from Droet. You get Morgan a rum to help him tend to his relationship woes. And you snuggle up softly to Mira and Kira, your lovers.

You start to particpate in a duel, bopping your hips, swishing your skirt, twirling your sword. Szuzak is on the other side of the ring from you. ...He starts to grin maniacally, and goes into a frenzy. "Show me... your... power...!!" You become panicked and fearful... and then you just run directly out of the ring.

You feel yourself running through water. It slows your steps.

You run toward your lovers, and you see Haru with them. You reach out to talk to him... he gets stabbed. By a dagger glowing with holy light. You run to tend to him frantically, and look up to see Jackson, cringing, backing away... then running away.

You look down at Haru, submerged in water. It's gotten even higher.

Kira is in emotional distress over it all, beside herself, and Mira is... enraged. Positively incensed. She looks around for someone to fight about it and finds Jaycy. Jaycy instigates, and Mira just bites.

The water is at your waist, and it's taken on a current that threatens to carry you away.

You desperately plead for the two of them to try and work it out. Neither of them want to. Neither of them are able to. The water surges higher and higher, and you are swept away.

You try desperately to bring peace, but all you can do is thrash uselessly against the current. You need to breathe. Your body is panicking. You try to breathe. Your air fills with lungs. You drown.

Just a normal night in Rhy'Din.

...You wake up.

You draw in a sharp breath as you sit up, and continue to breathe in rapidly, close to hyperventilating. Tears threaten the corner of your eyes, and as you realize how you felt in that dream... how you felt last night... they spill over. You start to sob in your bed, clutching your favorite bunny tightly.

"I can't do this anymore...!"

--- --- ---

There's a ghost in the mirror
And in the loneliest of nights, you can feel it coming closer
Should've known that the fear
Is gonna bury you beneath all the love that you held there
--- Ghost in the Mirror, by Mallory Knox

It takes about an hour and change for you to get to any state resembling functional. Your eyes are sore and red, and you have a headache from all the crying. You needed last night, December 19th, to be normal. Non-stressful. Aside from the Yule Ball, every visit you've had to Rhy'Din has been absolutely horrible.

You need to just get away from Rhy'Din. Everything in it, and everything near it.

This dueling nonsense is to blame for all of it, and you've had enough of it. Inflated egos threatening people out of the ring for what happens inside of it. You don't understand it and you don't want to. None of this macho nonsense aligns with what brought you out to begin with and why you continued to participate.

So you're writing your letter of retirement.

To the Duel of Swords staff and community:

The events that have taken place within Rhy'Din as of late have caused me a great deal of duress, shaken me to my core, and made me wonder what I am even doing here.

I am a woman of peace, and while I have strived to teach the kids of the dueling school how to resolve conflict and preserve their own safety while reducing harm, there are those who are celebrated within these walls who instigate conflict, make threats to the safety of those outside the ring, and continuously drag those I believe in through deep waters of trauma and force them to be versions of themselves that they don't want to be.

There are those who would respond by calling me weak. And my response to that is: I am. I am just a regular, mortal human. I only came out here because I wanted to learn self-defense, and I continued to come out here because I wanted to be a competent adventurer and safely serve those who come to me and my guild for help.

It is clear to me that I don't belong here, and I am no longer sure if I ever really did.

Effective immediately, I am retiring the Barony of Dragon's Gate. I have dropped my ring off in the staff dropbox.

Regards,
Elina Luisante

Okay... it's done. You look at it with a shaking breath. Is your handwriting okay? It looks a little shaky in some places. Maybe you should have type--

> Whoa, whoa, whoa! What the hell are you doing?

And then there's this asshole. Why did they take so long to wake up? "...What does it look like I'm doing?"

> Oh, and now you're talking back to me, with your voice.

"How else am I supposed to respond? You and that other voice that made me dramatically confess my love to Mira!"

> What, and it's not how you feel?

You clench your teeth, then stand up and angrily walk over to the full-length mirror and stare yourself down. "To be honest, I don't know that it is anymore! And... and that proposal! She almost proposed to me!" You weren't going to accept it anyways, but it wasn't going to be because of how you feel about Mira, it was going to be because of how you feel about marriage itself. But still... the thought that it was about to happen, and then this...

> Wh... what? ...What are you saying?!

"Why does she keep getting into it with people?! I tell her that I love her and that I believe in her, and every time I'm with her in that cursed city, things go sideways and she behaves in the exact opposite way that I thought she could! That I need her to!"

> Wh... who's fault is that, though?! Jaycy is the one who's instigating her, and that is on top of Jackson's nonsense, and her mother of all people! You know you relate with mother problems!

"Yes, I relate with mother problems, but I don't respond to them by threatening to burn everything down and dancing on the ashes!"

> Th... that's a trauma response!

"So what?! Hope is right! I can't keep handwaving away everything she does! It's one step forward, two steps back! I am a woman of peace! It's becoming clear to me that Mira is a woman of war and doesn't know anything else! She can't know anything else!"

> That's not fair! That's not fair and you know it!! She spent so long fighting fascism!

"Yeah, but she isn't anymore! She's here! She's with me and Kira! So why is she still looking at everything like there's a fight to be had?!"

> But Jackson behaved toward her in a way that was all fashy! And had that special task force, and--

"And she's blowing up dance academies that are trafficking fronts along with who the hell knows what else!"

> Are you... are you justifying the task force?!?!

"No... no! No I'm not!" You grip the sides of your head, clutching tightly at your red-tinged brown hair. "I get it! I get that vigilantism is necessary! It was right for her to do that! But she is continuously throwing herself into situations where people have little choice but to respond extremely! She's doing it on purpose! I mean... for Olympus's sake, she dressed us all up in goth lolita military uniforms! I didn't even think about how messed up that was!"

> What are you even trying to get at?!

"She lives in a world where there is more peace than she has ever known but keeps finding war, and it's starting to feel like it's on purpose!" You speak the next part with shaky breaths. "I can't... I can't deal with that anymore. I...!"

> So you're thinking of both retiring your Barony and breaking up with Mira?!

"Yeah, I am! This dueling nonsense is part of why this has all gone to shit! This is what has dragged her back down and halted all of her rehabilitation! And yet, I don't know why I thought I could possibly tame someone who fights people with an object that weighs four goddamn tons! Why, because... because she's hot? Because she dances good? Because she plays music good?"

> Why are you acting like there haven't been any good times with her?!

"There have been so many good times with her, and that's..." You start to cry again. "...That's why this hurts so much!!" You fall to your knees, your face in your hands. "I have had wonderful times with her, but the bad times have been... so horribly trying! They make me wonder why I bother coming out even though I know that all my other friends are there!"

> N... no, stop... please... you can... we can...

"Who the fuck is 'we'?!" You scream out in rage, and glare at the mirror. "Who the hell even are you?! What even are you?!"

> I... I don't know. I... I...

You don't know if it's delirium induced by emotional duress or tricks played on you as you try to glare at the mirror through your tears... but you feel like you see someone in that mirror.

It looks like a ghost. The suggestion of some cyan form. They're on their knees too, and they may be as tall as you. They look like they might even be a woman.

You crawl over to the mirror, eyes still teary, and reach out to touch it. The ghost in the mirror reaches out to touch you in kind.

> Please...

As the voice pleads to you in your mind, as you are touching the ghost in the mirror, you feel closer to her than you have ever been. "Is... is that... you? Who... who are you, really?"

> I... I don't know how to answer that. Just... please... don't throw everything away yet.

You've never heard the voice so clearly before. You can identify her characteristics. This is clearly a woman's voice, and it sounds... familiar. "Why does it matter to you so much?"

> Please, just listen to me. Just... text the group thread. Ask her to drop her challenge against Jackson.

"The... the air challenge?"

> Yeah. Let's start with that. If she is to heal... and you with her... she needs to get over these urges to feed into conflict.

"I... I don't know if that's going to go well."

> Yeah, well... it's not like breaking up with her will be any better for anyone.

"I... suppose that's fair enough." You struggle to your feet, and amble over to the table to retrieve your phone, sitting next to the retirement letter. You tap out a text.

EL: hey, uh...
EL: i feel like this may be either the worst time or the best time to suggest this...
EL: but i think, maybe... you should cancel your challenge tonight, mira.

You walk back over to the mirror. Your tears have dried up mostly, and your head is pounding more. ...But you can't see the ghost in the mirror anymore. "...What if she doesn't take kindly to the suggestion?"

> Then speak your feelings, and if you have to... take a break.

You can still hear her voice clearly. Whatever just happened drew you closer to her. "Isn't a break just a euphemism for a breakup? Like an unpleasant task that you're putting off?"

> No, it's not. The semantics do matter. Mira needs the ability to disentangle herself from all of this and actually heal. And so do you.

You sit down on the floor, staring into the full-length mirror, waiting for a response to the throuple thread. "I suppose that's true." Your phone vibrates, and you look at it.

KA: I agree

You sigh. Kira has your back on this one. You just hope that Mira gets it, too. You look at the mirror again. "...I get mad at you sometimes, but you've been really good to me. ...Thank you."

> ...It feels good to be treated like a person and not a symptom of mental illness.

The realization that there might actually be a person on the other side of some sort--or rather, that this possibility is more real than it's ever been--makes you feel like you've been very unkind to her. "I... I'm sorry."

> No, no, it's okay. I get it, honestly. Sorry for being passive-aggressive.

You pull your knees up to your chest and hug them. "To think you might have been real, this whole time... I just... I wish I could meet you..." You sit there and stare at the mirror for a few moments. You have been pushed past your psychological breaking point, so it's still possible that you were just hallucinating, but something about that experience just now felt very real.

Your phone vibrates again, and you look at it.

MB: I'm done with dueling, loves. Juice isn't worth the squeeze. I'll keep training with magic... keep fit... but there are literal mad gods in there, and I can't protect the people I love that way. Sorry if I worried either of you.

You sigh. This brings you... some sort of relief? It feels not quite right. You look over to the retirement letter you left on the table.

> It feels like she is missing the point.

You agree. It feels she's still putting all of the blame on the others in there, when she desperately needs to heal just as well, herself. You think Hope was right; to challenge her because of her advocacy for Jackson in the Overlord challenge test was unnecessary. ...But still, this is a start. A break from dueling is what she needs to heal.

KA: I was worried. I would like an opportunity to discuss it with you soon. I love you, both of you. I think it is time to heal.

...Honestly, it's probably the same for you. And probably even Kira. Tippy tap tap.

EL: i love you both, too. and i agree with kira.

You look over to the retirement letter again.

> You don't have to retire. Matt Simon didn't duel for two whole months and he didn't get kicked out of his barony.

Oh yeah, that's why he was there last night, huh. Hmm. You wonder... You back out of the throuple thread, see a text thread with Hope directly below it, and give it another look to make sure you didn't say anything regrettable to her in your emotional delirium.

EL: hey. thanks for keeping composure back there. i really appreciate it. i'd like to talk with you sometime.
HN: No worries. I get emotional in the Outback. You can stop by there or my gym in New Haven any time you'd like, I'll order food.
EL: okay, thank you. emotions were running high for everyone, for a lot of complex reasons. i'll look forward to seeing you. please take care.
EL: and in case it wasn't clear, just us two. i think it will be better that way.
HN: That sounds good I'll tidy up the place

Wow, that one went really well. But yeah, you remember now. While your partners were instigating each other, you two were trying to find understanding. You still feel like a talk with just the two of you is going to be the best way to move forward in cleaning up this mess.

> Do you want to do that today?

Not... not today. You don't really feel like doing anything today. You decide to call Neo. "Hey, Cap. I, uh... I have to... cancel my, uh... everything... today. I'm really sorry..."

[Ellie Luisante]

And there's no hope in this mirror
I feel it beating like the past
Every second makes it clearer
That you and me in the mirror
Died many months ago, it's like we've never ever been there
--- Ghost in the Mirror, by Mallory Knox

It's Tuesday afternoon now. You spent last night with Kira. You have talked with her about the voices before, but when the topic was reprised this time, it was very different. You also had a phone call with Maggie not too long ago today. She seemed really upset for you about all this. It almost seemed suspicious when Cap called you very shortly after, and asked you to come in to meet someone.

You walk into Neo's office at Seraphim Knights HQ. He's by himself sitting at his desk. There's no one else here. ...You are instantly confused. "I... thought I was meeting someone?"

Neo looks up from his tablet at you, and seems a little surprised. "Oh! Yeah, you are. I'll bring her in now." He stands up, walks out from behind his desk, and clears his throat. He then moves like he's about to cast something? He takes a deep breath, and begins to focus his energy. Lights of all four cardinal elements swirl up around him. "Ancient ruler of the elements. I summon thee. Come, Maxwell!" He points his hand out to an empty area of the room, and the air splits open, pouring light forth.

> Did... did he say Maxwell?!

You are taken aback by the portal of light appearing in Cap's office, and even more taken aback by what happens next. A beautiful woman steps through, with an elegant white, black, and blue skin-tight dress covered in black and gold gear motifs, and long blonde hair that reaches down to her knees. Her bangs are accentuated by one particularly long shock that takes a swoosh shape, teal at the tip. Vibrant magenta eyes briefly take in her surroundings before falling upon you... and then widening, almost in alarm.

Meanwhile, you, on the other hand, probably need to get sent to horny jail. You gulp down a knot because she is gorgeous. This is Maxwell? The Lord of Aselian Spirits?

Neo, on the other hand, looks like an absolute gremlin right now, grinning mischievously. "What's up, Maxwell? How is your day going?" Maxwell straight up glares at Neo. She is unhappy. But... she doesn't say anything. "What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?" She grits her teeth. Clearly, big mad. Neo looks over to you. "Hey Ellie, what do you think of her?"

> Okay, keep it in your pan--

"G... girl hot..."

> ...Well, then.

Maxwell looks at you and blushes with an incredulous expression. Neo almost cracks up on the spot.

> That's the Lord of Spirits! If you're gonna be horny, have some decorum!!

You shake your head rapidly to break the spell. "Um... I... I mean... she's... she's absolutely beautiful. You're positively gorgeous, Lord Maxwell."

The Lord of Spirits suddenly seems very bashful. To think mortal compliments would flap her! She rubs the back of her head sheepishly and finally speaks. "Um... th... thank you..."

> ...Hey, wait a minute.

You start to respond, but words don't escape your mouth. A realization stops them. ...You've heard her voice before. "Have... have we met?"

Maxwell slaps a hand over her mouth. Neo is grinning even more, and she glares daggers at him. She looks like she wants to cuss him out but can't.

> ...Too late. That's her. That's... the voice. The one you can't ignore.

Holy crap, that's right. Your eyes widen, and you take on an unreadable expression with an agape mouth as you point at her, which would be incredibly rude if not for the fact that you just realized she has same voice as the one you literally can't ignore whenever it appears in your head. Maxwell's voice is very distinctive. Deep but feminine, with shades of regality. And so is that supernaturally compelling voice. There is no way you can mistake it. That's her.

Maxwell realizes that, once again, the jig is up. She slaps her hand to her forehead and sighs. "Neo, the next time you want to drop an earth-shattering revelation, can you do me a favor and give me a heads up?"

You go to Maxwell's corner even though you feel very conflicted about her right now. "Yeah, actually, I'm not really in great shape for this, either."

Neo's impish grin finally ebbs away, to a calm smile. "Actually... this is the best time for this. I know things for you have been difficult. But I wanted to at least make sure that you'd be well enough for this." That's why Cap called right after your phone call with Maggie. She updated him on how you're doing. You certainly can't begrudge her for that, but you also kind of wish she had lied about it.

You frown and shake your head. "Neo, you don't even know the half of it. I had a retirement letter all written up and I was about to go turn in my ring, and I was thinking about breaking up with Mira because I can't handle the stress of getting pulled into fights all the time where I have to try to clean everything up."

Neo frowns with concern and empathy. He didn't know it had gotten quite this bad. "I do, in fact, know the half of it... but the voice in your head talked you out of it, right?"

> He... he knows about me?

"You... you know about her?" You look between Neo and Maxwell with a troubled expression.

"Her?" Maxwell interjects. "You know her pronouns? When did you start regarding her as a legitimate person?"

"First of all... what? Second of all... ...what???" This is the only reasonable response to someone you haven't told about the voice in your head knowing about her and regarding her as a legitimate person. You weren't even doing that until yesterday, and you have the voice!

"I think we kind of chucked her into the deep end on this one," says Neo.

"There's no we here, Neo," says Maxwell, "You summoning me in front of her was your plan."

"Yeah, and that was the extent of my plan." That makes you and Maxwell both glare at Neo. He shrinks back a bit with his hands up.

You look to Maxwell. Her beauty is much less intoxicating when you know she is a real person--er, god, apparently?--who can boss you around from inside your head. She pulls the strings and makes them ring, and you dance like a puppet. Your brow furrows at her, and her expression is difficult to parse. Somewhere between regretful and unapologetic. She sighs. "Explaining how I factor into this is going to be difficult. But it will be easier if you understand who she is."

> She's talking about me, again... go ahead and answer her question.

"...I started thinking of her as a legitimate person yesterday morning. I had a breakdown after writing my retirement letter and sort of... got into it with myself. I was yelling at myself in the mirror while she yelled back at me in my head, and when I started crying, I... I saw something in the mirror that looked like a ghost, and when I touched it, I started to hear her voice much more clearly. The ghost in the mirror looked like a woman, and her voice sounded overtly feminine." You grab your upper arm with your other hand and look away a bit. "Up until yesterday, I was sure it was just schizophrenia. I was asking my therapist to treat me for it, but nothing worked. But this explains why nothing worked. It all felt much more real than it had ever been. ...I still thought it was possible that my breakdown made me sink so far that I started hallucinating..." You look into Maxwell's vibrant eyes meaningfully. "...until just now."

There's no longer any room for doubt. The voice in your head is a person of some sort.

> ...

But that acceptance gives you so many questions. "Ma-- er, Lord Maxwell... who is she?"

Maxwell breathes a sigh and takes a moment to think about that. You don't rush her. You imagine the answer must be very complicated, so you want to be understanding. She does eventually say something. "Would you like to meet her?"

> ...She can't be serious?

This surprises even Neo, who blinks while he double takes. "Pardon?"

"I didn't even explain it well when Neo confronted me about all of this," says Maxwell. You look over to Cap. How long has he known about this? What clued him in to even dig into it?

> It's Maxwell, so... he might have found out after that first incident with Jaycy.

He rubs the back of his head sheepishly. You look back to the Lord of Spirits, who continues. "But if you would like to meet her, it would explain things better than I can with words."

> That's... that's possible?

You are not sure about this, but now you are glad that Cap was checking on your well-being with Maggie before throwing you into this. You could not have handled it yesterday, there is no doubt. You're still not entirely sure you're up to it today, but...

You think about it, and wonder the question out loud in your mind: Would you be comfortable with that?

> I don't know, would you?

I don't know, either. Thinking of you as a person is still new to me. You glance to Maxwell, who seems to be able to tell you're talking it out with the voice, and is waiting patiently.

> And being thought of as a person is still new to me, too.

Maybe... maybe that's why we should go ahead and do it.

> ...I... I think you're right. But I have to admit, I'm very nervous about it.

I am, too. Everything has been so much, lately, and now this, on top. You look over to Cap. "Cap, why did you think now is the time to do this?"

Neo smiles kindly. "Your mental health has been a dumpster fire lately."

You narrow your eyes at him. "...Not wrong, though I wish you used other words."

"The point is... I think it will be good for your mental health to have a more symbiotic relationship with the person in your mind. And better still for the two of you to know each other."

> ...I agree with him.

I do too, actually. "Okay... um... thanks for thinking about me then, Cap." You look back to Maxwell, take a deep breath, and nod. "We're ready. Let's do it."

Maxwell smiles kindly as well, and steps over to you. She places her hand on top of your head. "The main thing I have been unable to discern here is whether or not she is a person living inside your subconscious, or a person in a separate space who is connected to your subconscious. It's entirely possible that both things are true simultaneously, but in order to facilitate this, we will treat your subconscious as a separate space and allow you to enter it." She points another hand out, and a portal swirls to life. "...Walk through there, and you can meet her."

You take a deep breath and walk over to the portal. "...Are you ready?" Neo and Maxwell both know you're not talking to them.

> ...I'm ready.

"Okay, let's do it."

You step through.

[Ellie Luisante]

Full throttle, full speed ahead
And I'll move the earth around to save you
And my head would have a heart attack
Without you, without you
--- Ghost in the Mirror, by Mallory Knox

You're walking down a hallway of swirling cyan light. The light is captivating, and draws your attention away from what's directly in front of you for a moment. When you look back in front of you, there is a door. It looks like the door to your old apartment in New Haven, from back when you lived there. You knock on the door, and it opens by itself. You walk in, and are shocked to find what you see.

This is your old studio apartment in New Haven. ...Except... it's... not?

You take a look around and examine it. Everything here is subtly different. It's like it was decorated to your tastes, but also not, like your tastes were subtly different.

The walls of your apartment are painted in a light pink. Your carpet is light brown, and so fluffy that you could sleep on it. But you don't have to because you have a comfy bed with lots of plushies on it. Bunnies, squiddles, kitties, puppies, and even a scalemate. Your favorite, is, of course, the light blue bunny on the bed. His name is Nigel. There's a small purple couch, and a decent-sized TV is mounted on the wall. Underneath it is a wide dresser where your fashion accesories and game consoles sit. A simple desk is on the a different side of the room from your bed, with your computer there.

...Why did you just think of all of this as "yours"? You have a sinking feeling about this. You are aware of a presence behind you, and you turn to face it.

It's you.

But... it's not you. Not quite you.

No, this you is... subtly different from the current you. Her hair is thinner, and a sort of light brown, where yours is very fluffy and a vibrant red-tinged brown. Your face is the same, but your cheeks are more blushy, and her lips are a slightly different color than yours. To think you had decided to wear your favorite outfit today, because she is wearing her version of it. Her outfit's colors are very slightly more muted than yours. Her skirt has a flower trim instead of your polka dot trim. Her necklace is more ornate. Her shoes are different.

"You know..." she speaks in a tone that conveys a great deal of exhaustion. Exhaustion that is almost... existential, even. It's no wonder her voice sounded familiar when you could finally hear it clearly. It's your voice. But with a tone you have never used, and you're hearing it as if listening to it speaking from outside, rather than how your own voice sounds different from inside your own head. "...I never was able to make my hair as fluffy as yours."

Your eyes are wide, and you're in utter shock. The person who's been inside your head this whole time has been you? "I... uh... you... um..."

"Take your time, darling." It seems she has nothing but time.

"So... just to make sure..." You are having a lot of trouble with the notion of talking to who is apparently a different version of yourself.

Her expression takes on a hint of mischief. "My name is Barnstench Fartface."

You glare at her. "Stop that."

She chuckles. "Elina Anais Luisante."

"You're me. ...But... also... not."

She nods slowly. "I am you... from a different timeline."

...You need to sit down.

So you sit down on the strangely familiar yet unfamiliar couch. She walks over and joins you on the other side. You take a deep breath. You don't even know where to start with all of this. You decide to start from... well, the start. "...I started hearing you shortly after I came to Rhy'Din. So... how did you get in there?"

She nods, then shrugs. "To tell the truth, I don't remember anything between the end of my own life, and when I appeared inside you."

You blink and double-take. "You... you died?!" That was quite a detail to casually drop.

"Yeah. It was strangely appropriate when you were thinking of me as a ghost in the mirror. I didn't make any effort to get out of your head yesterday morning, but there is a part of you that clearly wanted to see me." She stands up and walks over to the standing closet with the mirror doors that you used to have, and that she apparently never stopped having. "There's no doubt about it; you were having a breakdown. But breakdowns are often catalysts for change." She's looking herself over in the mirror. She does a spin, sending her long, voluminous skirt briefly flying. You faintly blush for a bit as you watch her, and so does she. "I hope you don't mind that indulgence. I normally have to experience this euphoria vicariously. I... don't even have a body, normally."

"N-no, please feel free." You don't normally get to watch yourself spin except in 1080p at 60 frames per second. You need a nicer camera. Watching her spin reminds you how much of a cutie patootie you actually are. That comment about her not having a body registers, and you look around a bit. "So your body, and this space..."

"Temporary constructs, provided by Maxwell to facilitate this meeting. She provided the material, in a manner of speaking, and I manifested it into this." She gestures to the studio apartment.

"Wow... she really is something, huh?" You look around you in awe at the simulated apartment from the other timeline.

"She is." She looks at herself and her temporary body wistfully, and sighs. She then walks back over to the couch and rejoins you.

"So this apartment is the apartment you lived in before you, uh..." You don't want to say it.

"Died, yes." But she just spits it out and gives you a weird look, as if she thinks you're weird for sugarcoating it.

Well, you think she's weird for not sugarcoating it. "What happened, exactly? You seem like you're a different person than me."

She sighs, and pulls her legs up onto the couch. "Well... it all started with that damn slaver throwing me in his sidecar."

You triple-take, and blink rapidly. "...Hold the fuck up, you got captured by a slaver?"

She nods sadly. "Yep, sure did. And everything went downhill from there. Granted, I was able to get out, with the help of Serge, Brutus, and who you know now as Detective Lysander Kirsch."

Time to start putting pieces together. "So in that timeline... Serge was still our best friend?" She nods. "And we knew Brutus." She nods again. "Did we know Pixie, too?" Another nod. "But the detective... didn't find his own memories back then, yet?"

She shakes her head, and shrugs. "Can you really blame him? He was looking for a specifc leaf in a forest, and that sort of thing would naturally take a while. No, back then, he was still going by the name Kersh Caliber."

You continuously nod, as if the motion is going to help you digest all of this. "Okay. So... our friends helped you escape an actual slaver... wow."

"Yep. I even killed the bastard."

"You..." Wait, there is a version of you that kills people??? "...come again?" The hits just keep coming, huh?

She sighs a ghost of a chuckle, and her eyebrows lift piteously. It's weird. You don't judge people for killing to survive in dangerous cirumstances, because it's not fair to them. And yet... this is you, and you don't kill people. ...How different were you, back then?

She knows what you're thinking, and answers pre-emptively. "Everything that happened to me started in Rhy'Din calendar year 2013. I was 21 then." You briefly do the math, and your ages don't line up. Alternate timeline weirdness. "I was studying the jian very, very casually, because I lived in Rhy'Din and didn't want to get killed by some ne'er-do-well, but I was not an adventurer. I didn't even have dueling experience. I just kind of... got thrown into the deep end and had to sink or swim. I didn't have the luxury of being able to develop my skills over time, or learn to fight non-lethally, or join an adventurer's guild to refine and expand that technique while helping others. ...Or even just to live in a nice place like New Prism. Back then, it was still just Old Prism's rubble. Nobody had even thought to go near it, let alone rebuild it."

This time, you're the one looking at her piteously, and you feel like you should say sorry as a means to extend sympathy, or even apologize for having the much cushier life. She shakes her head and interrupts your train of thought. "I don't resent you for being able to live this life, because you are living the life I wish I could have lived then. I am legitimately so, so happy that you get to live this life, and I'm happy that I still get to be a part of it... after losing mine."

You are split between two conversation routes now. How is she part of your life? How does this all work for her? But also... you really want to know what happened to her. Why did she die? You decide to start there. "What happened to you?"

She sighs. "I'll skip to the end. We'll have plenty of time after this to fill in the middle. So... the slaver's presence in our world was not natural. If you weren't already sick of timeline nonsense, I've got even more. Sorry." You brace yourself for more confusion. "So, there was an alternate timeline where the angel who had destroyed Old Prism, Nihil Eternity, was never killed, and he ended up taking on the mantle of Maxwell. He invaded my timeline, along with individuals who took on the mantles and roles of Aselian spirits. That slaver, Jasper Stone, had the role of Gnome. Our entire thing was to get them all out, but it was made complicated by the fact that Nihil's squire had been messing with Serge's head."

"Squire?" you ask with a tilt of your head, noting the specific choice of words.

"In Nihil's timeline, he held the unified title of Overlord, Archmage, and Diamond."

"O-oh... I see." That notion sounds utterly wild to you. "...So he had a squire."

"Yeah. Serge was already a very different person in my timeline, but that squire made things even worse. To make a long story short... even though we were able to push Nihil and his goons out of our timeline... Serge, he..." She still seems to be struggling with the fact of the matter herself, even after all this time. "...He died."

This makes the color drain completely from your face. "He... he what?"

"Yeah, that reaction is... the reasonable version of how I reacted." She points over to the bed, and you look over. You see her there, just lying there motionless. There is no life in her eyes, and she is emaciated.

You gasp, get up from the couch and run over to her, and bring your hand in front of your agape mouth in disbelief. Are you... are you watching an alternate version of yourself die?

You hear her voice behind you. The real her has stood up from the couch and walked over, placing a hand on your shoulder and looking at the projection of herself on her bed with you. "It's natural to struggle when you lose your best friend to the cruelty of death... but what had happened to me was not natural. Nihil left a poison in our universe that threatened to seize all of our hearts. ...Well, as you can see... it definitely got mine."

You look over to the other you, with your eyes full of tears. She seems surprised by this. You wrap her up in a hug and squeeze her tight, and just let the tears flow. "Oh gosh, cherie... I'm so sorry you went through so much!"

...Something clicks for her. She had been detached from her own situation for so long that she had forgotten: she really did go through so much. So after what felt like a lifetime, the other you allows herself to feel her feelings, and starts to cry as well. She wraps you up in a hug too, and you spend the next while just... feeling, together.

Afterwards, you two are back on the couch together. She starts back up, "So... that's why I tend to get pretty... visceral, and panicky... when it comes to your bonds."

You nod empathetically. "It's really understandable that you would want to protect them so fiercely. I'm glad I have you in my corner to help me protect them."

She smiles, feeling your appreciation in earnest.

"So," you continue, "How did you end up in this timeline? Inside... my mind?"

She takes some time to think about it, then responds. "I actually don't have any idea. One day you woke up in the finishing school, and I woke up along with you. But it became evident to me that I was a passenger along for the ride, because I could not control your body. I was aware of your thoughts and feelings, but also aware that they were not my own. I could tell I was you... but I was you, separately from myself."

"I see." You nod. But you remember the first time you heard her. "And then, one day..."

She knows what you're getting at. "...One day, I decided to try to talk anyways. Except instead of trying to talk through you, I tried to talk to you, and I was aware of the fact that you heard me. And I was also aware of the fact that you had no idea what to make of it. ...At first, I was kind of shy about it, but I grew confident in providing you guidance."

"Guidance, huh?" You tilt your head to the side.

"Would you call it something else?" She does, too.

You giggle. "Before yesterday, I would call it being a pain in my neck."

She giggles back, and blows a raspberry at you. She seems to be regaining some of her old personality back. You can't imagine that an alternate timeline version of yourself was always so dour, but you really can't blame her for having been that way after everything that happened to her.

You nod. "Guidance sounds like a good way to describe it. And you're not always around, are you?"

She nods back. "That's correct. My consciousness is intertwined with yours, but separate. I can simply sleep whenever I wish. I usually make a point to check out when you're getting intimate. Even though you're me, I still feel like it's rude."

You blush, and then giggle. "I appreciate that."

"I also became aware that I do have special powers when it comes to guidance. I can attempt to provide guidance to others as well."

"Oh?" You perk up curiously. "Who have you tried to guide?"

"So far, I have only succeeded in guiding Serge. I tried Pixie once, but her subconscious rejected me. It seems that they have to be amenable to guidance. And it ends up pretty invasive whenever I do... I can experience their thoughts and feelings."

"W... wow." You blink. "So... does he hear you the same way I do?"

The other you shakes her head. "Serge has only ever regarded my suggestions as random impulses, which I guess is better than him thinking he has schizophrenia. And sorry about that, by the way. It felt like you thinking you had that particular mental illness was worth being able to guide you."

"De rien," you say, handwaving away the apology. "I didn't know you could just sleep, or leave, whenever you want. I can't tell when you're around or when you're not. I only know that you're around if you're talking to me."

"Hmm..." the other you taps a finger to her chin. "I had thought that was for the best, but I wonder if that is actually the case?"

You think on it too. "I wonder if I could be trained to notice your presence or lack thereof?"

Her head bobs side to side as she does the mental crunching. "We are much closer now, and both Maxwell and Cap are aware of all this." She nods. "If you want, I think it is worth trying to do, and that they could help."

"Right, Maxwell..." you frown. The other you frowns too, because she has realized what you're thinking about. You continue, "It is very troubling that her guidance is... well, not guidance. Coercion. I can ignore you if I really think your suggestions are stupid. But not hers. What she gives is more like commands, and I must follow them."

She looks over you, closes her eyes for a moment, then speaks. "Have you noticed that when Maxwell gives you a command, you get stronger?"

You shake your head. "I haven't really noticed that."

She nods, then continues. "I think that's because you lose consciousness for a bit, depending on the command." Actually, that sounds right. You were outside the ring while Jaycy and Mira went at each other, and then you were inside the ring between them, Soul Charged. She continues, "But there's no doubt. Her influence makes you stronger. I think Maxwell is here to give you extra help if you somehow get really in over your head."

You furrow your brow, because that sounds like nonsense. "Really? Then why did she get me into trouble there with Jaycy?"

"That, I... I don't know." She scratches her head, perplexed herself. "It may have been a lapse of judgment. But somehow, I was able to push her out."

"You... you were?" Your eyes widen.

She nods. "I didn't think I could, and maybe I wasn't able to before. But I tried really hard because I was worried about you, and I succeeded."

You smile gratefully, and then think some more. "...But there are other voices, too. Even though I couldn't hear it clearly until yesterday, your suggestions have always had the same voice. There are other voices, as well."

The other you nods, and then shrugs. "I am not sure about the nature of those voices, but we both know that they hold a stronger sway with you. I think that is something we should ask Maxwell."

You nod in agreement.

(An optional listen for extra impact.)

And then just like that... you're out of things to talk about. You look around, trying to think of something, but you can't. So you look back to the other you, and smile warmly. "Thank you, Ellie."

She giggles, and shakes her head. "Oh... oh no, Ellie. We... we are not doing that."

"What do you mean, Ellie?" You grin at her.

"No, seriously..." She shakes her head, and waves her hands dismissively. "Stop, cherie. My... my story is over." She looks wistful for a moment, but then looks at you with profound fondness. "This is your story now. You are Ellie Luisante, and I am so proud of everything that you are."

"Th... thank you, but..." you look at her wistfully. "I cannot simply leave you to fade into obscurity! You had your own life! Your own thoughts, feelings, and experiences! I want... I want to keep your memory. I want to keep the notion of you as your own person, and honor you."

She seems like she is tearing up again. She wipes them away, but they just come back. "You are... too sweet. Well, then... you will just need to give me another name."

You think about it, then shake your head. "No... no, we're going to cheat. We're going to steal a page from Serge's book. You will keep your name, but like him, you will go by your middle name." You take a deep breath, and smile fondly... at Anais Luisante. "Your name is Anais."

"Anais, huh..." She giggles, still tearful. Thankful beyond words that you want to keep her memory alive. "I like that... thank you, Ellie."

You move across the couch and wrap her up in a soft hug. "Thank you, Anais." She hugs you back, and strokes your fluffy hair fondly. ...It doesn't take long before you notice that her contact is starting to fade.

The constructed environment is starting to crumble around you, dispersing in a sea of swirling cyan light. When you look up, Anais's own body is starting to fade away too. She's smiling at you despite her body breaking away in countless, tiny particles of cyan light. You wish you could hug her a little bit longer, but it's not to be. It looks like your time together as separate beings is over.

Now, it's time to make your future... together.

[Ellie Luisante]

It's been almost a month since you met the soul living inside your mind, who you have dubbed Anais: your middle name. After all: she's you. You from a different timeline, who died of grief after her best friend died. But you, nonetheless. This greater understanding and respect toward each other has made both of you stronger.

You met her thanks to Maxwell and Neo. It turns out Maxwell had been protecting you because of a promise she made to the soul of Serge from Anais's timeline, but after having provided means to empower you and Anais together, and now that you know what she had been doing, she could no longer provide any guidance to you through the channels used by Anais and... the others. Maxwell was very cagey about who the other voices were, but it seemed like she both wasn't entirely sure herself, and also that what she did know could have been perilous knowledge.

You and Anais have grown together since then. Both through communication and enduring tribulation, such as being on break with Mira. But not every talk between the two of you has gone as well as you'd like. And sometimes, they've gone... catastrophically bad.

Full throttle, full speed ahead
And the world will turn around
When it is only you and I
Just drive, just drive
--- Ghost in the Mirror, by Mallory Knox

You wake up on the morning of Tuesday, January 18. Your ears are ringing from the deafening silence in your mind since last night. You got into an argument with Anais last night after a shutout hit her really hard, and she disappeared after. What was it you said to each other?

"Why are you always quitting?! You damn quitter!"
"Q... Quitting?! I... don't... You...! I...!!"

...Was that how it went?

You had this sinking feeling that you were on the edge of saying something particularly horrible. But calling her a quitter is already bad enough as it is. After all, she literally died of grief.

You still have to apologize to her. You still have to work things out.

You get out of bed and lightly stretch. You don't hear her yet, but that's normal. You normally don't hear her in the mornings when you're getting ready for the day, or at night when you're winding down. You don't hear her during the usual hubbub of the regular work day, or when spending intimate time with partners.

So as you get ready for your day, it's normal that you don't hear her. When you put in your brief shift at the bakery on your therapy day--Tuesday--it's normal that you don't hear her. But you take off early today with approval from your boss. You normally just go straight to therapy after work, but you need to give yourself extra time to talk to Anais.

So you go home, and take a deep breath. You suspected last night that you might be able to force her awake by use of a mirror, since your mirror was instrumental to your first true meeting with her.

You stand in front of your full-length mirror and place your hand on it, looking deeply into your own eyes. ... ... ...You didn't think that would be enough by itself, but you were kinda hoping. You won't know she's awake unless you hear her. That is something you had thought about working on, but you were unsure how.

Anyways, that's for later. You wonder what you can do to reach her. It's a little tough to come up with ideas for hard situations entirely on your own, but you have to. You owe it to her because being in conflict with her hurts your soul. ...Huh, soul. Anais does have her own soul, right? You can reach into your own soul for all sorts of things. What if you can use this mirror to...

You take a deep breath, and focus. You feel your awareness move down the length of your arm, through your hand... and across the threshold of the mirror into the hand on the other side. It moves down the arm as if traveling the length of someone else's arm, then moves downward into the mirrored center.

You grab hold of what you feel there and shake it as if trying to shake someone awake.

> (Gasp...!!)

You hear her gasp in your mind, and you see her in the mirror for a brief moment before she fades. That compact light brown bob in sharp contrast with your fluffy ginger bob. ...And her eyes, jerked open and widened in surprise, but also reddened, as if she's been crying.

"...Sorry to wake you up."

> ...Great, you can do that now...

You hold up a 'one moment' finger, grab one of your chairs from the dining table, and put it down right in front of the full-length mirror and sit down. "...Um... would you be okay with having a talk?"

> Sure, I guess. You went to all the trouble of figuring out how to wake me up.

"...Okay, thank you." You're not sure where to start, but you also know that Anais is aware of your thoughts whenever you think them strongly enough that they have significance worth noting, such as right now. You decide that you might as well just start. "I'm very, truly sorry for last night."

> I... I appreciate that. I want to say that I forgive you, because I do want to forgive you, but... I really need you to know just how deeply all that hurt me before I can say that.

"That's okay. I'm here to listen to you."

> Hah... listening to me was the entirety of our relationship until December.

"True, but I'm also the only one who can listen to you."

> That's true, and... that's part of why it hurt me so badly. You're the only one in this world--aside from precious, darling Mew--who can hear me, Ellie. You're the only one who knows my story. You know who I am. You... insisted that I should have a name when I was content to let go of myself. It was different when you thought I was just schizophrenia and you would just riff at me to cope with it, but ever since you found out I was real, you have treated me with the same kindness that you treat everyone else, and that I had tried to treat others with when I was alive.

You nod as you attentively listen, eyes locked with your own in the mirror.

> Friends get into fights sometimes, that's obviously just going to happen, but I... really wasn't ready for you to say that to me. When you called me a quitter, it hit at something really deep at me.

You already know what she is alluding to; you figured it out right after she started to lose her composure.

> Because... even though I was in grief, and even though Nihil had poisoned all our hearts, I... it's... technically true. I quit living.

You cringe in empathic agony, feeling profound guilt at the possibility that you led her to such harmful self-talk thoughts. "Anais, I...!"

> Please, let me speak just a little bit longer. I... am not really an amateur when it comes to negative-self talk. I have tried to listen to your therapist to help myself as well, but I'm still good at negative self-talk. But you never really have the same frustration with yourself that another person has with you because it's hard to see yourself from the outside. And that hits yet more differently when that other person is, well... still you.

This makes sense to you. Come to think of it, some of Anais's jibes from before she was named would have hurt you in a similarly strange way if you had known at the time that she was you.

> I had never really thought of myself as a quitter until then, and when I took stock of all the things I tried to quit, well... that particular cherry on top was... especially upsetting, to understate it for brevity. It felt like I was being horribly unfair to myself, and that you were being unfair to me. And for some reason, it hurt that much more when you--who is me--were trying to talk me out of giving up during that shutout. I... never really could talk myself out of giving up when things got really hard. I always needed help to get out of it, like when Pixie came to my aid after I was captured by Jasper. So the thought that there was a version of me that was trying to talk me out of giving up made me feel so inadequate because... why couldn't I have done that? After all, I did.

Your head is kind of hurting from all the... complex multiple self business implied here... but you feel like now is a good time to go ahead and speak up. "I'm sorry for having said such mean things to put you into that terribly difficult situation. I didn't mean to be so unfair to you."

> I forgive you, and I am happy that you wanted to patch things up with me, and try to make me feel better.

You wish you could give her a hug. You decide to grab hold of... hmm, let's see... ah! Your Badeline Celeste plushie, and give her a big, soft hug. You feel like it's appropriately symbolic.

> Thank you, cherie. But while I was away, trying to become consolable, I was thinking that, maybe... I could have stood to be a little more resilient and determined.

"What do you mean? Are you being hard on yourself some more?" You start to chide her.

> No no no, that's not what I mean. Like... I wonder if I am over-inclined to give up or surrender due to the influence of trauma, and what, if anything, I could do about it.

She takes a moment to think of her wording, and you don't rush her.

> ...With everything I went through, there's a lot of trauma there, right? Everything that happened to me started when I wasn't an adventurer; I was just a weak young woman who happened to know a little sword fighting. Although imagine my surprise when you willingly became an adventurer anyways, rather than being thrust into it like I was. The apple didn't fall very far from the... uh... alternate timeline apple, huh.

Anais's hamfisted metaphor makes you giggle, and you decide to elaborate on it in an attempt to try and help uplift her. "No, but it fell with gravity rather than being picked." ...You can't tell if it did anything at first, but you hear the lightest giggle in your mind. Success!

> I actually never really had a therapist like you did. I kind of wish I could have had one.

You think on it for a little bit, and manage to play your thoughts close to your chest. "...Do you wish you could have one now?"

> Now? I mean... I guess that would be nice, sure, but I'm dead, and I'm a disembodied voice who lives in your mind and magically projects to provide influence to others. What good would therapy do me?

"I don't know, maybe some peace of mind?" you propose with a shrug.

> I don't have a mind; I'm squatting in yours!

"Anais, stop with the semantics!" You manage to retort through giggles; the notion of her being a mind squatter is just too funny! "The point I'm trying to get to is... maybe Dr. Silvein can provide you therapy somehow?" That's the name of your therapist: one Valroh Silvein, a demimale dark elf with a PhD in psychiatry who found a welcoming home and open minds in New Prism.

> But wouldn't that mean giving up time that is meant for you?

"Cherie, you are me." You push through the multiple self headache to provide reassurance to the other you. "And aside from that, we are inextricably linked together. I can derive indirect benefit from it the same way you have thus far. Besides... I care about you. And Dr. Silvein already knows about you and believes in your existence."

> So if anyone would know how to provide me direct therapy...

"They would." You nod and smile softly. "I think we should do it."

There is a long pause while you stare into the mirror in anticipation, but you finally hear a response.

> ...Yeah. Yeah, I would like to do that. Thank you.

Your smile brightens, and you reach out to the mirror and softly touch it with your hand.

You feel a touch of warmth from the other side.

[Ellie Luisante]

It's a short trip to Dr. Silvein's office later that day, which is, again, January 18th. After all, pretty much all of New Prism is very walkable, similarly to Rhy'Din. It sucks to have to do it in the winter, but that's just life, and you're glad you have stylish winter coats that match or accentuate your long, flowy skirts.

It's not a very long wait in their office, either. You see their prior client walk out ahead of them, a kindly gnome with whom you have crossed paths here many times. The two of you share warm smiles with each other, and you look up from him to see Dr. Silvein follow him out.

Dr. Valroh Silvein is, again, a demimale dark elf. Their flawless dark cobalt skin is accentuated by golden tattoos of impeccably elegant design and placement. Their long white hair falls down over ears pierced by golden rings, over the back of a dark blue suit vest that matches pants made of the same material, and accentuate the pale blue long-sleeve shirt worn underneath. The entire suit is finely tailored and the black loafers that finish off the outfit seem to have been recently shined. If there's anyone who holds a candle to Nero or Angel in the style department, it's this dude.

Their voice is soft and soothing, especially in combination with the subtle accent with which they speak the common tongue. "Good afternoon, Ellie. Shall we get started?" You smile warmly and nod, following them into their office. You take a seat on the stereotypical patient's chair that you can lie down on should you so choose, while Dr. Silvein sits across from you in a comfortable-looking chair that looks like a blend between an office chair and a more loungey type of chair. They pick up a notebook from a desk nearby and open it up, flicking through the pages.

You take a deep whiff of air scented by one of the magitech diffusers they have plugged in on the wall off to the side from the two of you. "Oh, that is a lovely scent. What did you go with today?"

They smile warmly. "I believe the packaging called it 'Mango Sentinel.'"

"Thank you! I'll make sure to get the Mango Sentinel for my own home as well."

"I am glad I could provide you with inspiration to make your home a space that further brings you joy." Their smile is warm and earnest. "It seems there are a lot of things to cover today." They're not wrong. Soon it will have been one month since you discovered the truth about the other you, which is already a lot by itself, but there's also your break with Mira, and you also recently lost the Dragon's Gate barony to Nayun, who closed up the Dueling School.

> Gosh, they don't even know the half of it.

You let out a brief, quiet giggle. But Dr. Silvein picks up on it, and smiles knowingly. "Anais had something to say, I take it?" You nod. "Then I suppose that is as good a place as any to start. How are things going recently between the two of you?"

"I would say, with the stark exception of last night, very well."

> I think I agree with that.

Dr. Silvein frowns slightly, with shades of empathy and concern. "Is that something you want to talk about?"

"Actually, yes... we both agreed it would be very important." They nod, signaling their readiness for you to speak on it. "Um... so... last night, we were really arguing during a duel, because we were on the way to get shut out, and we did get shut out. She was so determined to give up on the duel, and that frustrated me, so I... called her a quitter. And it... it really hurt her." Your face looks legitimately rueful, and your tone sounds much the same, but this is far from the first time you have confessed to lapses in kindness, and as always, Dr. Silvein nods with an expression absent of any judgment.

You wait for a bit, in case they have anything to ask. They pick up on this, and decide to go ahead and ask a question. "At what point did you regret having said that?"

You rub the back of your head as you think about it. "I think... almost immediately? The way she stammered through trying to reply to me made me realize how hurtful it was. I wasn't all there mentally, and was super caught up in my emotions. So I didn't realize how hurtful it would be for her particular circumstance until after I had already said it. And that's when I felt regret for having said it."

Dr. Silvein nods again, continuing to wear that impeccably judgment-free expression. And yet you can still see cogs turning behind their eyes as they think about it.

You continue. "And after that, she... disappeared for the rest of the night, and most of today. I was able to wake her up by touching a mirror and reaching through it to her soul. So we talked it out. She told me why she felt so hurt by it. Of course, in some aspects it was obvious, and in others, not as much. Like... being encouraged to keep going by an alternate version of yourself when you had trouble keeping yourself going in your own timeline. Giving up had always been a problem for her, and it hurt to be confronted with that by, well... herself." This multiple self stuff is still giving you a bit of a headache, but you're going to have to tough it out. You get the feeling it's only gonna get more complex from here.

> Wait, wait. I bet they're gonna... Perceive.

It's at this point where you catch the slightest tilt in Dr. Silvein's head, and the faintest change in their expression. They've taken on an academic interest in your particular case once again. You've seen them take this subtle expression before, and it's happened particularly often since you told them about Anais.

> Ha! Knew it.

You can't help but react to having caught this subtle change, with a tiny smile and faint, brief giggle. Dr. Silvein sighs in defeat and shakes their head. "Goodness, it seems you've caught me taking particular interest in your case once again. Nothing gets by that acute emotional perception of yours."

You let the giggles flow a little more freely. "It helps that I've been your patient for such a long time."

"And yet, until recently, my understanding of your unique situation was so inaccurate."

"That's because we were both wrong on what the situation actually was."

"Indeed. I have believed you from the start since you came to this revelation--after all, it is entirely feasible in the world in which we live--and yet this bit you have shared with me offers the most academic credence to your claim thus far."

Your eyes widen slightly in surprise. "Huh? Why is that?"

"What you have just shared with me explains two different things. Anais came from a different timeline where she lived a very different life than you, partly due to the differing points at which you both arrived in Rhy'Din. You were both still teenagers when you left Terra, and you both had formative experiences left to make. A propensity toward surrendering is certainly one thing that might develop differently from you, given different formative experiences." You nod, and Dr. Silvein continues. "What is most striking about this, is this concept of an 'othered self,' and the way she reacted to something that was different between the two of you despite you being the same person." The term 'othered self' makes you double-take a bit, but the Doc continues. "I cannot imagine that even the most cynical of psychiatrists would still believe this to be schizophrenia if they heard you say that. Because schizophrenia would typically not go so far as to invent a person with their own history, let alone the presence of unique trauma."

> At this rate, they're going to beat us there.

I mean... won't that make it easier to ask them to give you therapy?

> ...I... yeah, I suppose it would, huh.

You decide to go ahead and just pop the subject. "There's no implication about it... Anais does have unique trauma that she was unable to address while she was alive."

That breaks Dr. Silvein out of their academic thought processes. Within a few seconds, they're back in the mindset for being your therapist. But there's also a flicker of realization in their eyes. You think they might have an inkling of what you're about to ask them.

"She has been present through all of our sessions, and we do share many of the same issues. She has been able to benefit from therapy that addresses issues that we share in common. But I've had issues that she never struggled with as much. And just the same, she has issues that I never struggled with. She said that she wished she could have had her own therapist. And I said... well..."

Dr. Silvein smiles knowingly. "Why can't she have one now?"

"Y... yeah! Um..." You rub the back of your head sheepishly. "We... we wanted to ask if you could devote some of my sessions to helping her instead, if that's something you'd be comfortable with. And if the, uh, rules... would allow you to do so, since Anais is a different person."

They continue to smile as they explain. "In terms of bureaucracy and ethics, your case is already accounted for. The field of psychiatry in this realm has seen individuals like you before, after all. You and Anais together are considered a 'linked soul entity'." Your eyes widen in surprise to hear that the field has seen people like you before.

> Wait, then why did we have a false flag for schizophrenia for such a long time?

Actually, that's a good question. Before you can ask, they continue. "Traditionally, the personalities within linked soul entities have much earlier awareness of each other and their own natures than you and Anais. They feel the differences in their souls by way of magical perception, or they have the ability to share control of the shared body somehow, or there's some clear outward evidence of some sort that there are two people in one body. Even now, Anais is mainly a voice, and she did not assert her own individuality and identity for most of your time together. Or maybe she tried to at first, but gave up because she could not convince you." Doc's eyelids go down just a bit, shooting a knowing look not quite at you, but... more through you. After all, it's not meant for you. It's meant for the other you.

> W... whoa...

And it looks like she caught it loud and clear. They continue. "So to answer your question; your request is perfectly within the rules, and I would be very happy to speak with Anais and try to help with her issues."

> Awesome! But then... how would I...?

"The main problem is we need to come up with a way for her to speak with me on her own," says Dr. Silvein, who is on the same track as Anais.

You scratch your head. "That sure is a question, huh... I'm nowhere near good enough of a mage to be able to project an entire soul, even if it is, in a sense, mine. I was able to see her by way of a mirror under duress, but her voice was still just in my head."

> Wait! What if I try to...?

> Be Valroh Silvein.

You attempt to be Valroh Silvein, but you can't because they are autonomously rejecting all manner of magical psychological influence, which is an umbrella that you--in this context of inter-narrative limbo, Anais Luisante--fall under. So instead, you continue to be Ellie Luisante.

> Ugh! It didn't work.

"I just felt a strange itch in the back of my mind," says Dr. Silvein. "Did Anais attempt to project to me?" You nod, feeling kind of guilty that you didn't stop her. They smile gently. "I do not take offense; it was a good idea, given her abilities. I simply hope she understands that as a psychiatrist keeping confidential information in my mind, I must vigilantly guard it from all magical externalities."

> No, it's fine. I totally understand.

"She says it's fine, she totally understands," you convey.

Doc nods with the most subtle degree of relief, but then inspiration twinkles in their eye. "Hmm. Then why not simply continue on just like that?"

"Pardon?" You tilt your head confusedly.

"Mayhaps you can simply convey what she is saying. Perhaps..." They stand up and move over to their bookshelf, an impeccably-manicured finger searching through the titles. They find one, pull it free, open it up, and begin flipping through. "...Yes, this may still work, even in your case." Your head tilts the other way. You want to be let in on the plan! "Often times, when one component of a linked soul entity wants to explicitly hand over control to another, they will use a meditative state to facilitate that. I think we should be able to reuse those principles."

"A... meditative state?" With the third head tilt back the other way, you're officially New Prism's cutest bobblehead.

They take the book with them back to their chair and sit back down. They take a few moments to absorb the material, then snag a bookmark from their vest pocket, save their place, and close the book. "Alright, let us try this. Take a comfortable posture, and close your eyes." You fidget around a bit to get comfortable in the chair, re-smoothing the folds of your abundant skirt, and then do as they ask. "Now, focus on clearing your mind as best as you can. And once you reach that state, consciously focus on the fact that your body is a vessel that you are sharing with another soul. You are going to create an accommodation for her. You want to give her a voice so that we can help her. Focus on that intent."

Your heart feels calm as you take long, steady breaths and think about the other person in your mind.

> I feel like I'm being stared at.

Your mouth moves in the shape of the words: "I feel like I'm being stared at." No voice comes out.

Dr. Silvein smiles. Which you don't get to see because your eyes are closed. "Excellent. Now focus on the sound of Anais's voice. Imagine connecting a circuit from her soul to your voice box, and your mouth. Focus on being her voice and being her mouth, as best as you can." You nod slowly. "Now... Anais, please introduce yourself."

> This is making me sort of nervous...

"This is making me sort of nervous..." You speak the phrase with a voice that is still pretty distinctly yours, but it does sound, the tiniest bit, like you're doing an impression.

> (Gasp!)

You gasp! The shock jerks your eyes open. Dr. Silvein releases a jovial chuckle. "Those weren't your words, were they, Ellie?" You shake your head. "Let's start over and try it again." You nod, and redo the steps. You close your eyes, clear your mind, and breathe slowly and deeply. You focus on accommodating the roommate in your mind. You focus on connecting her to your voice box and your mouth. "Now, then... my name is Dr. Valroh Silvein. What is yours?"

> My name is...

"My name is..." This time the voice that comes out sounds much more like the voice you've been hearing in your own mind. Which is natural; it's your voice, after all. But it's like an actor performing a different character. Anais naturally speaks in a different manner than you naturally do. Her cadence is different. Her tone, her inflection.

"> My name is Elina Anais Luisante."

"Lovely," says Dr. Silvein. "It's very nice to meet you. How does it feel to speak to someone without being inside their mind?"

"> It... it feels... really good, actually...!" Your mouth starts to curl into a smile, by a will other than your own. And yet, not entirely not yours either; you're excited about this, too!

"That's wonderful to hear," replies Doc with a stronger happy inflection than what they usually let into their speech. They have a lot of reasons to be happy about this! "How peculiar, though. You and the main driver of your vessel have the same name. How do you handle that?"

"> Doc, you... don't be silly, you know that." Her voice, spoken through you, is teeming with complex emotions.

"Humor me anyways."

"> When we met thanks to Maxwell, Ellie gave me the name Anais. I... I initially didn't want to have a name, I wanted to fade into the background. But now..." Tears start to run from the corners of your closed eyes as Anais's emotions overflow. You can even feel the joyous tears in an inscrutable part of your soul. "> Now that we're here... actually talking...! I...! I'm so grateful! Thank you so much for this, Ellie, and you too, Doc!"

Without even thinking about it, you bring your arms up to hug yourself as Anais cries through your tear ducts. The hug mostly your will this time, but you feel the distinct impression that the other you wanted to hug you as well. You're so welcome, cherie. The rest of this session is yours.

"It makes me feel truly heartened for the two of you to share this moment, and I am looking forward to doing everything I can to help you, Anais," says Dr. Silvein, with a new vigor and excitement. "So." They reopen their notebook to a new page, and get ready to write. "Let's get started."