Turn Around Sound

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Nell Holliday
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Turn Around Sound

Post by Nell Holliday »

Dead or Alive's 'You Spin Me' plays for an intro

Nell: Hello and gooood afternoon, kids. Welcome to the very first Turn Around Sound! Thanks for taking the inaugural voyage on Ship Awesome with me, your hostess, Nell. This is when all my listeners get a chance to take over the airwaves and tell me exactly what you want me to play. But not because you're entitled, because I let you. And you have to play by my rules, which essentially are, you gotta come prepared with the reasons why you pick the tracks you do. Otherwise what will we have to talk about? Your feelings? I have with me today Corlanthis Wystansayr, who has agreed to be the first, and therefore coolest, listener thus far. So he's kind of like my first mate. Welcome to the show, Cor.

Cor: Hello everyone! It's great to be here and I'd just like to thank you, Nell, for inviting me onto your show. I think that probably qualfies as talking about my feelings, but since we haven't started any music yet I figure I'm probably in the clear.

Nell: You can talk about your feelings a little bit. But only because you're my first mate. Thank you for subjecting yourself to me. Did I mention to everyone that I get to molest you at least once if you come on the show? But that's part of the fun of the whole thing. Cor, tell us about where you're from.

Cor: I didn't actually see that when I signed up, but as your First Mate, I willingly put myself in the line of fire for your cause. We didn't really have a name for it. I come from a world that doesn't travel through space,you understand. So we didn't think about things like planets and the name of our world. I didn't learn about things of that nature until coming to Rhy'din.

Nell: My mind was just blown, and I didn't have much of one to begin with. SO! Let's get down to brass tacks. You have music on your weirdy non-space-travelly homeland, yes?

Cor: Music? Oh, yes. Not so diverse as you find here, but we do have a very thriving musical industry. I often wish I there was a stable way through the Nexus so that I could return home occasionally. I miss the music quite a bit.

Nell: That's like… legitimately sad. I have tears in my eyes. Well, luckily, through the intervention of the music gods, we have a few songs from Cor's homeland to regale you all with. Cor, can you tell us the first song and why you chose it?

Cor: It's not that sad. The first song is the Royal Anthem of my homeland. Our music styles lean more towards instrumental pieces rather than singing. And this piece really shows off the variety of different instruments we use in our music.

Nell: Alright, bomb. Listen up, all, to Cor's Anthem, which is what I've renamed it for now.

The song would start off with a heavy compliment of brass instruments and drums before the strings and woodwinds flowed in

Nell: That was beautiful, straight up. I think there might be some instruments in there that I've never heard before.

Cor: It's very possible! We use the talents of my people to enhance our music in different ways. For example, we capture bird song in specially enchanted stones and use that to influence and accent our music.

Nell: Bird song in stones... and I thought I'd heard of everything. Well, kids! You heard it here first- the national anthem with bird-song-in-stones enhancements! And here you thought you wouldn't hear anything new. Alright, Cor, tell us about your next song.

Cor: Certainly! But first, I need to tell you that I totally made that birdsong thing up. I was just curious if you'd believe it or not. The next song is a passage from one of the plays of my homeland. About an evil wizard menacing a country, and a princess gathering a group of soldiers to go and fight him.

Nell: Well now I'm upset you lied about bird song. Sweet, an epic journey. Let's listen in.

The next song would feature heavy use of woodwinds and pianos. Much more lowkey than the boistrousness of the anthem.

Nell: So, Cor, when you were little did you imagine being one of the soldiers, the wizard or the princess?

Cor: Uh. . . Oh, uh. Well. None of the above really. I've never really thought about it. All little kids want to be the dashing here right? The one that swoops in and saves the day and runs off with the princess?

Nell: I'd want to be the evil wizard, because that meant I could just do whatever I wanted. Break things, annihilate people- you know, all that stuff that kids want to do but their parents won't let them. Watch your kids, listeners. They're plotting. And whatcha got going on for your last pick?

Nell: Sure that always sounds like fun, but things never seem to end very well for the evil wizard, do they? The last selection is one my people played during celebrations or when simply having a good time!

The final tune was a fast-paced melody full of stringed instruments and drums. With a much faster beat than the previous two.

Nell: Alright, I could definitely get down and groove to that. Or at least flail around and pretend I looked amazing. Do you ever just put this on here and go wild?

Cor: Not so much, no. I don't really have a lot to do with where I'm from. Honestly, I've come to Rhy'din to get away from a lot of that. Not that it hasn't been fun to listen to those songs again.

Nell: And that's what it's all about, now isn't it? Well, hell, I am glad you are here, and I'm sure the rest of Rhy'Din is, too. Especially because you bring such sweet, sweet tunes. Cor, thanks so much for joining me today to share your music picks. I hope you enjoyed your time taking over the airwaves.

Cor: Oh, I surely did. It's been a pleasure, Nell! Thank you for having me on, and thank you for letting me share a little bit of where I'm from with your listeners!

Nell: Well, that's our show for today. For his participation today, Cor will be receiving two tickets to any upcoming concert and a KLIT-AM 900 prize pack, which may or may not include a signed picture of Seirichi's rack. Remember that anyone can come join me here at the station. If you're interested, send an email to nell@klit900.com with your music picks and if I'm not bored to tears I may invite you on. And remember to add the '900', because klit.com is somehow already taken. Keep it dirty, kids.
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Post by Nell Holliday »

Nell: Welcome, kids, to another freakin' fantastic episode of Turn Around Sound. Today I have with me one coooool cat- see what I did there? Ha!- with Mr. Khoom Helston. Thanks for showing up, Khoom.

Khoom: And thank you for having me here, Nell. You don't mind if I call you Nell, do you? Quite a fantastic little setup you've got here.

Nell: You can call me whatever you want. Why, thank you for not saying its a sh*t hole.

Khoom: Be careful, I might take you up on that. It's quite cozy though.

Nell: I try to make it nice for my guests. You know, a doily here or there, a monogrammed place mat. Really, guys, it's beautiful in here. Alright, so let's get down to brass tacks. Khoom, I think a lot of people know who you are, but is there anything you want to share with the group before we begin the musical section of our adventure?

Khoom: From what I've learned of things, most of what I have to share isn't usually suitable for the general listening audience. I am a Helston, after all.

Nell: As long as it's not herpes, I'm sure the audience won't mind the sharing. Buuut, I feel ya. And if I had censors I bet they'd love you. So then, let's get going. Tell us your first song, and why you chose it.

Khoom: Well, for my first song choice, I went with a soothing little number just perfect for unwrapping a delicious little present. It's got a smooth rhythm, and I happen to enjoy that sort of thing.

Nell: Awesome, let's get it started.

Royals

Nell: You play this for the ladies, Khoom?

Khoom: Ladies, gentlemen ... really, in my line of work, one can't afford to be too picky. I know a few tricks, of course.

Nell: I've heard. And none of that here, my girlfriend might be listening.

Khoom: Of course not. I only work my wonderments with permission.

Nell: Alright, Cassanova, what's the second tune you've got for us?

Khoom: Well, for my second choice, I thought I'd go with a little something I employ during the course of the evening, performed by one Ludacris.

Nell: Alright, ladies and gents, you hear him- Sex Room.

Sex Room

Nell: What's the last pick you have for us?

Khoom: Oh, a delightful little number by Jamie Foxx, called Unpredictable. It usually fits the mood for most escapades, I've found.

Nell: Alright, get your 'capades ready, boys and girls! Here's Unpredictable.

Unpredictable

Nell: Is anyone naked out there, anyone?

Khoom: pslyderfrtoal: Hmmm ... are we accepting calls with this program?

Nell: Noooo, no. We're not that kind of show! But maybe you could sell it to the radio manager?

Khoom: I may have to look into that. In the meantime, I'm certain you're just chock full of questions.

Nell: Possibly. But first, why did you pick that last song? Just because it went along with the whole flavor of what you've got going on?

Khoom: It's one of my personal favorites when it comes to theme songs and ... suggestive settings.

Nell: So this is like Khoom's Theme?

Khoom: Oh, there are several. This just seemed the most appropriate. One can't just use the same three songs over and over, as I'm sure you well know.

Nell: My theme song changes weekly. I feel ya, bro. Well, Khoom, thanks for stopping by. We're almost out of time here, but maybe you could hang for a few and we could chat?

Khoom: But of course. I made sure to clear my appointment book for today, just to be on the safe side.

Nell: Excellent. Anything you want to add or plug to the masses before we skedaddle?

Khoom: Just one thing, I believe. Shop House Helston!

Nell: You heard him! Shop Helston! WHOOO! Thanks for listening to Turn Around Sound, boys and ghouls. And major props to Khoom Helston for stopping by to share his musical taste with us. Khoom today will be receiving a prize pack of merch, including two tickets to any upcoming show for hanging with me. Remember that if you want to get on the show, send an email to nell@klit900.com and if I pick you, you can come kick it with me on air. Peace.
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Nell Holliday
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Post by Nell Holliday »

Nell: Hello and a hearty what the f**k’s up from yours truly, Nell. Welcome to another installation of Turn Around Sound. Today I have a special guest. Actually, dos special guests. My sisters, Rhona and Eilidh.

Rhona: Hi, everyone! Actually it should have just been me, but Eilidh decided to tag along.

Eilidh: Actually, Rhona forgot she had to take me to school before she did this so now I’m here. And totally late to school.

Rhona: No one asked you.

Eilidh: You could just let me go to school myself.

Rhona: Hell no, you can’t! You’re-

Nell: ALRIGHT, ANYWAY. Rhona is older than me and she’s hot. And single, so check the KLIT-AM website to see a picture of her. I’ll sell her for cheap.

Rhona: Super cheap.

Nell: And Eilidh is our youngest sister, who is seventeen. You will not see her picture online because she’s a precious little jewel baby whom will never date.

Eilidh: I’m almost eighteen, you kn-

Nell: Say hello, ladies.

Rhona and Eilidh: Hello (There is some additional unintelligible muttering from Eilidh)

Nell: Since Rhona would be the main focus if she wasn’t so bad at taking care of responsibilities, we’re gonna roll with her. Rhona, could you share with the group what your first song is?

Rhona: The first song I chose is a total shout out to the fact that we’re Scottish as hell. So this is Sleepy Maggie with vocals by Mary Jane Lamond and f**king rad fiddle by Ashley MacIsaac. Who is a dude. Also they’re both from Canada but still Scottish so shut up and enjoy it.

Sleepy Maggie

Nell: That was Scottish as balls! No one knows this but Eilidh was Highland dancing. And Rhona was drinking whisky like a bastard.

Eilidh: I don’t have my shoes, I couldn’t do that here. Plus you’d probably flip out if I hurt my ankle.

Rhona: I’m definitely drinking. That wasn’t a lie. Ok! I wish to share my next song!

Nell: Jesus, pushy much?

Rhona: I know what I want.

Nell: I know you’re a skank.

Rhona: Play my song! I’ll even do your job for you: this is Windowlicker by Aphex Twin. I like it because it’s got a good beat and it drowns out most things at work. Also it reminds me of Nell because ‘Windowlicker’ is a French slang term for someone who wants something they can’t afford and Nell’s broke as a joke.

Nell: At least I don’t have chlamydia.

Rhona: I’m going to punch you in the babymaker.

Eilidh: Rhona, do you really have-

Rhona: Play the song!

Windowlicker

Nell: And that was Windowlicker. And I don’t have a lot of money but I do it up well. Ask my girlfriend. Back me up, Andrea! Oh, and since she’s throwing a freakin’ fit, Rhona does not have any venereal diseases. That we know of.

Rhona: That’s better.

Nell: Free clinics everywhere will be flooding our phone lines to get you to test at their business once they hear this.

Rhona: Can we stop talking about my junk? Otherwise we’re gonna start talking about your tits. Or lack thereof.

Nell: They’re there and everyone knows it at the RDI because most people have seen them. But yes, let’s move on. What’s the third song?

Rhona: My third song is The Ghost Inside by Broken Bells. And I chose this because I just really enjoy the band and I like that he decided to sing all high-pitched. Don’t know why, but he did. And I’m ok with it.

Nell: Rhona likes dudes with high-pitched voices. Got it. KENZI! ADD THAT TO HER DATE PROFILE! Under her picture!... yeah, that one. Yeah, yeah, good. Ok! The Ghost Inside.

The Ghost Inside

Eilidh: Her last boyfriend did sort of sound high-pitched when he got drunk and started to cry.

Nell: Ahaaaaa! Seriously, Ei! What a dumbs**t that dude was.

Rhona: Hey, now, I did dump him as soon as I heard it. Wait… is the microphone back on?

Nell: Of course it is. Anything you say is fair game on here, sucker.

Rhona: And I can’t even compete because you have no shame.

Nell: Truly. Anyway, you got anything else to share? I think Eilidh’s gonna get detention if you don’t haul her a*s to school.

Rhona: No, I think that’s about it. Thanks for letting me forget I had this appointment and getting poor Ei detention.

Nell: And thank you for showing up after I called you seventeen times.

Eilidh: Can we go? Or I really will get detention and you’ll have to do my history project.

Nell: Just bring in a bottle of whisky. Bam. Scotland. Done.

Rhona: No, seriously, I blew a bag of d**ks in school. Let’s roll.

Nell: That’s it for today’s Turn Around Sound . Hopefully we’ll get Ei in again when Rhona’s not ruining her chances at college. You all know the drill- hit me up at nell@klit900.com if you want to be featured on the show. Send presents and your chances increase. Peace!
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